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Joke Quotes
The fine line between roaring with laughter and crying because it's a disaster is a very, very fine line. You see a chap slip on a banana skin in the street and you roar with laughter when he falls slap on his backside. If in doing so you suddenly see he's broken a leg, you very quickly stop laughing and it's not a joke anymore.
Roald Dahl
Broken
You
Laughter
Joke
Skin
Chap
Backside
Slip
Laughing
Fine
See
Fine Line
He
Roar
Between
Roaring
Disaster
Crying
Because
Doing
Line
His
Falls
Very
Banana
Leg
Quickly
Stop
Anymore
Suddenly
Slap
Street
The marvelous thing about a joke with a double meaning is that it can only mean one thing.
Ronnie Barker
Joke
One Thing
About
Only
Marvelous
Marvelous Thing
Mean
Double
Meaning
Double Meaning
Thing
Poetry is like making a joke. If you get one word wrong at the end of a joke, you've lost the whole thing.
W. S. Merwin
You
Word
Joke
Lost
One Word
Poetry
Wrong
Like
Making
End
Get
Whole
Thing
I often joke that I've just become a professional schmoozer. Like, nobody cares how well I can rock climb anymore. It just has to do with how well I can schmooze.
Alex Honnold
Joke
Nobody Cares
Become
Cares
Nobody
Like
Well
Rock
How
Climb
Often
Just
Anymore
Professional
I'm quite a reserved person, a bit shy at first when I don't know someone. I like to have a laugh and a joke; people have seen that in me.
Anthony Martial
Me
People
Seen
Joke
First
Bit
Laugh
Someone
Like
Know
Person
Quite
Reserved
Shy
Advice is sometimes transmitted more successfully through a joke than grave teaching.
Baltasar Gracian
Teacher
Sometimes
Joke
Advice
More
Through
Than
Transmitted
Successfully
Teaching
Grave
When a kid can understand that a word can mean two things, there's some real thinking going on. They have a vested interest in finding out what a word means, because it's the punch line to a joke.
Brian P. Cleary
Word
Joke
Thinking
Punch
Punch Line
Kid
Out
Finding
Some
Because
Understand
Real
Line
Vested
Vested Interest
Going
Interest
Mean
Means
Things
Two
My preference is for people who can do sketch comedy or situational comedy, where it's not a joke, but it's telling a story.
Carol Burnett
People
Comedy
Joke
Telling
Situational
Where
Story
Sketch
Sketch Comedy
Preference
Who
Audiences are always better pleased with a smart retort, some joke or epigram, than with any amount of reasoning.
Charlotte Perkins Gilman
Better
Smart
Joke
Pleased
Some
Always
Audiences
Than
Any
Epigram
Reasoning
Amount
A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke - and that the joke is oneself.
Clifton Fadiman
Sense Of Humor
Humor
Joke
Sense
Ability
Oneself
Understand
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is a joke - the fact that Madonna is in before Rush and Kiss. Those two bands have influenced so many groups and people other than in metal.
Corey Taylor
People
Kiss
Joke
Before
Other
Those
Madonna
Rush
Fact
Hall
Metal
Rock
Rock And Roll
Fame
Than
Bands
Roll
Influenced
Many
Groups
Two
The humanists' replacement for religion: work really hard and somehow you'll either save yourself or you'll be immortal. Of course, that's a total joke, and our progress is nothing. There may be progress in technology but there's no ethical progress whatsoever.
David Bowie
Work
Religion
You
Technology
Yourself
Progress
Joke
Nothing
Our
Immortal
Total
Somehow
Course
Replacement
Whatsoever
May
Either
Ethical
Really
Hard
Save
Everything we say has metamessages indicating how our words are to be interpreted: Is this a serious statement or a joke? Does it show annoyance or goodwill? Most of the time, metamessages are communicated and interpreted without notice because, as far as anyone can tell, the speaker and the hearer agree on their meaning.
Deborah Tannen
Time
Words
Joke
Our
Everything
Statement
Say
Tell
Goodwill
Annoyance
Most
Because
Without
Does
How
As Far As
Anyone
Meaning
Far
Notice
Speaker
Show
Agree
Serious
Interpreted
I never smile when I have a bat in my hands. That's when you've got to be serious. When I get out on the field, nothing's a joke to me. I don't feel like I should walk around with a smile on my face.
Hank Aaron
Smile
Me
You
Walk
Face
Joke
Field
Nothing
Bat
Out
Never
Feel
Like
Around
Got
Get
Hands
Should
Serious
To show that a comedian on stage in India talking about sanitation or in South Africa talking about HIV and AIDS awareness, if you follow the joke into their lives, you can see that, like, oh, these things aren't just contrived in joke books. This is real life. I think the best comedians have that bravery and courage to say, Oh, this is what it is.
Hasan Minhaj
Life
Best
You
Courage
Joke
South Africa
Real Life
Stage
Awareness
Think
AIDS
Books
Say
India
Follow
See
About
Like
Comedian
Comedians
Talking
Real
South
Contrived
HIV
Bravery
Oh
Just
Africa
Sanitation
Show
Lives
Things
The Soviet Union represents a threat in terms of might. It is a joke in terms of its economy and what it has to offer the Third World - a laughingstock to countries that are looking for an economic-development model.
Jack Kemp
World
Joke
Looking
Threat
Countries
Economy
Terms
Offer
Model
Soviet
Soviet Union
Represents
Might
Union
Third
Third World
My brother was listening to his transistor radio. He kept switching the earpiece from one ear to the other, which I thought was his idea of a joke. 'You can't do that,' I said. 'You can only hear out of one ear.' 'No, I can hear out of both,' he answered. And that was how I discovered I was deaf in my right ear.
Jane Lynch
You
Listening
Thought
Joke
Other
Out
Brother
Only
Both
He
Idea
Deaf
Said
Answered
How
Hear
His
Discovered
Which
Radio
Switching
Right
Ear
Kept
There is a painful joke that Europeans often tell of their Gallic neighbors: God created France, the most beautiful country in the world with so much good in it, and ended up feeling guilty about it. He had to do something to make it fair. And so, he created the French people.
Janine di Giovanni
Beautiful
God
Good
People
World
Most Beautiful
Joke
Feeling
Country
France
Guilty
Neighbors
Tell
About
Something
Had
He
Beautiful Country
Fair
Most
French
Make
French People
Up
Ended
Often
Much
Created
Painful
Europeans
I always joke about letting the haters motivate you. Everybody has that in their life, people who doubt them or make them feel less than they are. It just takes faith and belief in yourself, and you've got to dig deep into that. That has to come from you - nobody's going to give you that.
Jennifer Lopez
Life
Faith
You
Yourself
People
Haters
Joke
Doubt
Dig
Everybody
About
Give
Takes
Feel
Nobody
Come
Make
Always
Got
Motivate
Than
Going
Just
Them
Less
Who
Deep
Belief
Letting
You go, well you can't joke about race. Well if you're from a different race and that's your experience of the world and you want to talk about that, then fine. Or you can't talk about disability, but disabled comics can talk about that.
Jimmy Carr
You
Experience
World
Joke
Fine
About
Disability
Disabled
Talk
Well
Comics
Go
Different
Want
Race
Then
Your
Maybe the universe is a giant practical joke and we don't know the punchline.
John Lloyd
Joke
Universe
Giant
Know
Practical
Maybe
I realized that I get pleasure when I'm told, 'Don't listen to the haters; they're losers in their moms' basements.' I imagine these 'losers' and feel better about myself. Their insults hurt less if I label them 'pathetic.' I diminish their value in order to protect mine. I noticed that I'm quick to make a joke at someone else's expense.
Julie Plec
Myself
Hurt
Better
Value
Haters
Joke
Else
Mine
Pleasure
Diminish
About
Someone
Feel
Protect
Make
Insults
Losers
Label
Quick
Get
Pathetic
Listen
Expense
Order
Them
Realized
Noticed
Less
Moms
Imagine
But for me to have the opportunity to stand in front of a bunch of executives and present myself, I had to hustle in my own way. I can't tell you how frustrating it was that they didn't get that. No joke - I'd leave meetings crying all the time.
Kanye West
Time
Myself
Me
You
Opportunity
Joke
Own
Meetings
Way
Tell
Hustle
My Own
Had
Crying
Executives
How
Leave
Bunch
Get
Front
Frustrating
Stand
Present
I laugh and joke, but I don't get distracted very easily.
LeBron James
Joke
Easily
Laugh
Distracted
Very
Get
I'm not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I'm not.
Lewis Black
Great
Joke
Say
Writer
Comic
Odd
Which
I don't know how to tell a joke. I never tell jokes. I can tell stories that happened to me... anecdotes. But never a joke.
Lucille Ball
Me
Jokes
Joke
Tell
Anecdotes
Never
Know
How
Stories
Happened
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