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Jokes Quotes
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
Will Rogers
Politics
Government
Jokes
Facts
Make
Report
Just
Watch
I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde.
Dolly Parton
Jokes
Intelligence
Offended
Know
Also
Because
Dumb
Blonde
Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing.
Carol Burnett
Funny
You
Jokes
Sense Of Humor
People
Humor
Some People
Joke
Timing
Sense
Think
Everybody
Though
Tell
Able
Some
Born
Like
Know
Them
Teach
Who
It is requisite for the relaxation of the mind that we make use, from time to time, of playful deeds and jokes.
Thomas Aquinas
Time
Jokes
Mind
Relaxation
Make
From Time To Time
Use
Requisite
Deeds
Playful
Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee, and I'll forgive Thy great big joke on me.
Robert Frost
Forgiveness
Great
Me
Jokes
Joke
Big
Thy
Lord
Forgive
Thee
Little
A serious and good philosophical work could be written consisting entirely of jokes.
Ludwig Wittgenstein
Work
Good
Jokes
Philosophical
Consisting
Entirely
Could
Written
Serious
Our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, play no jokes and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives.
Robert Collier
Jokes
Sense Of Humor
Reality
Humor
Will
Thought
Subconscious
Sense
Think
Our
Minds
Our Lives
Tell
About
No Sense
Between
Continually
Difference
Cannot
Manifest
Eventually
Lives
Play
Image
Imagined
I enjoy jokes, smiling, and making people smile. I may be a little different, but that's OK, who wants to be normal anyway?
Tim Duncan
Smile
Jokes
People
Enjoy
OK
Smiling
Making
Normal
May
Different
Wants
Anyway
Little
Who
Comedians get jokes offered to them, rock stars get women and underwear thrown onstage, and I get guys that want to take me fishing.
Les Claypool
Me
Jokes
Women
Stars
Guys
Onstage
Take
Thrown
Comedians
Rock
Rock Stars
Underwear
Fishing
Offered
Get
Want
Them
I grew up in an environment of jokes and sarcasm and puns. I talk that way, so I write that way.
Allan Sloan
Jokes
Way
Puns
Write
Environment
Talk
Up
Grew
Sarcasm
I don't care what the haters and naysayers say. If they make jokes about me, I'll laugh because they'll probably be funny.
Paula Deen
Funny
Me
Jokes
Care
Haters
Say
Laugh
About
Make
Because
dont Care
Honest good humor is the oil and wine of a merry meeting, and there is no jovial companionship equal to that where the jokes are rather small and laughter abundant.
Washington Irving
Good
Jokes
Humor
Laughter
Wine
Meeting
Rather
Small
Abundant
Merry
Equal
Oil
Where
Companionship
Honest
It's just not funny to disrespect other people's beliefs, backgrounds, cultures, or identities when those are deeply rooted in longstanding oppression. Jokes that punch down on marginalized people require no creativity because they've existed since the beginning of time. It's like telling a knock-knock joke and believing you're Richard Pryor.
Franchesca Ramsey
Funny
Time
You
Jokes
Creativity
People
Oppression
Joke
Beginning
Down
Disrespect
Other
Punch
Backgrounds
Those
Telling
Since
Like
Identities
Because
Existed
Cultures
Pryor
Just
Richard
Richard Pryor
Rooted
Require
Beliefs
Believing
Deeply
Marginalized
A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.
George Eliot
Great
Jokes
Great Strain
Affections
Taste
Difference
Strain
The subconscious doesn't distinguish sarcasm and jokes. It just accepts what it hears. That's the power of words.
India Arie
Jokes
Words
Power
Subconscious
Distinguish
Accepts
Hears
Just
Sarcasm
I never ceased to be surprised when southern whites, at their homes or clubs, told racial jokes and spoke so derogatorily of blacks while longtime servants, for whom they quite clearly had some affection, were well within earshot.
Walter Cronkite
Jokes
Affection
Some
Blacks
Never
Had
Spoke
Clearly
Longtime
Well
Within
Were
Surprised
Southern
Quite
While
Clubs
Racial
Whites
Whom
Homes
Servants
I still haven't found the humor in getting hit by a cement truck. My knees still hurt when I think about it, so no jokes about that yet.
Adam DeVine
Jokes
Hurt
Humor
Think
About
Knees
Truck
Still
Hit
Getting
Cement
Found
I learned to think about religion, race and sex through the complex and often unattractive medium of jokes.
Andrew Hudgins
Religion
Jokes
Sex
Think
Medium
Complex
Unattractive
About
Through
Learned
Often
Race
I would write 100 jokes a day. Most of them were terrible. But I just said, 'I'll write more than everybody else, and that's how I'll get better.'
Anthony Jeselnik
Day
Jokes
Better
Everybody
Everybody Else
Else
Would
More
Write
Most
Terrible
Said
How
Were
Than
Get
Just
Them
Honestly, I like someone who is really grounded, super sweet, honest. I need them to have a sense of humor. I need them to laugh at what's funny, I need them to get jokes and be funny and be witty and sarcastic.
Casper Smart
Funny
Jokes
Sense Of Humor
Humor
Sense
Sweet
Honestly
Laugh
Super
Someone
Like
Witty
Get
Them
Really
Grounded
Who
Sarcastic
Need
Honest
Really, I'm pretty laid-back, always cracking jokes.
Chace Crawford
Jokes
Pretty
Always
Cracking
Really
Social media should be more like a cocktail party than anything else. You can have your fun jokes, and you can also express yourself and your beliefs. It's a conversation, not a sledgehammer.
David Harbour
You
Conversation
Jokes
Yourself
Social Media
Party
Cocktail
Else
More
Like
Also
Than
Anything
Anything Else
Social
Should
Your
Fun
Express
Express Yourself
Beliefs
Media
I'm just not the outgoing bubble of energy. But if I know you, it's different. Practical jokes. Have fun. I'm not looking for any new friends. I got my friends.
Eric Dickerson
You
Jokes
Have Fun
Looking
Energy
Outgoing
Bubble
New
Know
Practical
New Friends
Got
Friends
Any
Just
Different
Fun
The jokes are great but what really matters for a comedian is his performance, his whole attitude, and the laughs that he gets between the jokes rather than on top of the jokes.
Jack Dee
Attitude
Great
Jokes
Matters
Top
Laughs
Rather
He
Performance
Between
Comedian
His
Than
Gets
Really
Whole
I'll come up with an idea for a character, and I'll write some jokes and make sure that that character is going to have some legs to it - that it's really going to work. If I can come up with jokes and material that I think will work, then I make a cheap version of the doll. Achmed started out just being this little plastic toy from the store.
Jeff Dunham
Work
Character
Jokes
Will
Think
Out
Some
Write
Cheap
Idea
Come
Toy
Make
Sure
Material
Doll
Version
Up
Going
Just
Being
Store
Legs
Little
Then
Really
Plastic
Started
I always was an early-morning or late-night writer. Early morning was my favorite; late night was because you had a deadline. And at four in the morning, you make up some of your most absurd jokes.
Joss Whedon
Morning
You
Jokes
Late
Late-Night
Favorite
Some
Writer
Had
Absurd
Most
Make
Deadline
Make Up
Because
Always
Up
Your
Four
Early
Night
Early Morning
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