632 Joke Quotes for You to Enjoy

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke. Will Rogers

People Seriously Joke Politicians Changing Everything Taking Comedians

Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing. Carol Burnett

The world is indeed comic, but the joke is on mankind. H. P. Lovecraft

World Joke Indeed Comic Mankind

In my deepest parts of sadness, I'm always making a joke or being sarcastic. Lea Thompson

Sadness Joke Parts Always Making Being Sarcastic Deepest

When I was growing up, my mother was always a friend to my siblings and me (in addition to being all the other things a mom is), and I was always grateful for that because I knew she was someone I could talk to and joke with, and argue with and that nothing would ever harm that friendship. Marlo Thomas

Friendship Mom Me Grateful Mother Joke Nothing Other Addition Would Someone Could Argue Knew Talk She Because Always Friend Up Being Growing Growing Up Ever Things Sibling Harm

My life motto is basically to lower your standards and expectations so you're never disappointed and never put any trust in anything, and I try to prepare for the day that I wake up, and everyone I know is like, 'LOL JK best long-running practical joke ever', so I've never really let myself freak out or get too excited about anything. Tavi Gevinson

Life Best Myself Day You Trust Wake Up Try My Life Joke Too Everyone Out Freak About Never Excited Put Disappointed Long-Running Like For The Day Know Practical Wake Up Motto Expectations Get Any Anything Really Lower Your Standards Prepare Ever Basically

Pretension is a poor joke that you play on yourself. Snap out of it. Recognise your strengths, work on your weaknesses. Real achievement is liking what you see in the mirror every morning. Virat Kohli

The why is what makes journalism an adult game. The why is what makes policy coherent and useful. The why is what transforms bureaucrats and foot soldiers and political leaders into viable instruments of rational and affirmative change. The why is everything and without it, the very suggestion of human progress becomes a cosmic joke. David Simon

Game Change Progress Political Joke Everything Soldiers Cosmic Rational Adult Foot Leaders Journalism Instruments Policy Without Makes Becomes Political Leaders Affirmative Very Viable Bureaucrats Human Useful Human Progress Why Coherent Suggestion

I'm grateful for every stupid mistake and dumb joke I tried to make. Bo Burnham

Grateful Mistake Joke Stupid Every Tried Make Dumb

The aim of a joke is not to degrade the human being, but to remind him that he is already degraded. George Orwell

Human Being Joke Aim Degrade Degraded He Remind Him Human Being

The crisis of today is the joke of tomorrow. H. G. Wells

Today Tomorrow Joke Crisis

There are certain queer times and occasions in this strange mixed affair we call life when a man takes his whole universe for a vast practical joke. Herman Melville

Life Man Strange Joke Universe Vast Takes Practical Call Occasions Affair Mixed Queer His Times Certain Whole

Eternity is a mere moment, just long enough for a joke. Hermann Hesse

Long Joke Enough Mere Just Eternity Moment

It is the ability to take a joke, not make one, that proves you have a sense of humor. Max Eastman

You Sense Of Humor Humor Joke Sense Ability Take Make Proves

See, justice is a joke in this country, and it stinks of its hypocricy. H. Rap Brown

Justice Joke Country See Stinks

It's just not funny to disrespect other people's beliefs, backgrounds, cultures, or identities when those are deeply rooted in longstanding oppression. Jokes that punch down on marginalized people require no creativity because they've existed since the beginning of time. It's like telling a knock-knock joke and believing you're Richard Pryor. Franchesca Ramsey

Funny Time You Jokes Creativity People Oppression Joke Beginning Down Disrespect Other Punch Backgrounds Those Telling Since Like Identities Because Existed Cultures Pryor Just Richard Richard Pryor Rooted Require Beliefs Believing Deeply Marginalized

It is the test of a good religion whether you can joke about it. Gilbert K. Chesterton

Good Religion You Joke About Test Whether

Being a parent is not for the faint of heart. I may joke about knowing fear, but the fact is, the first time I ever knew real fear was the day Charlotte, my first child, was born. Suddenly there is someone in the world you care about more than anything. Harlan Coben

Time Day You Heart World Fear Care Joke First Born About Charlotte Someone Parent More More Than Anything Fact Knew First Child Faint Knowing First Time Real Than Child May Being Anything Suddenly Ever

Why would a lazy guy become a parent of five? Then again, why would creative people who inherently don't like change and criticism become writers, actors, or comedians? There's something about this process. I joke about it: My kids have made me a better person, and I only need, like, 34 more of them to be a really good guy. Jim Gaffigan

Good Me Change Creative People Better Made Criticism Joke Become Kids Would About Parent Something Guy More Only Better Person Writers Lazy Like Comedians Five Person Process Again Them Then Really Inherently Who Creative People Actor Why Good Guy Need

Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they're down, and when they're having a good time, I can carry on the joke. John Krasinski

Funny Smile Time Good Girl Joke Good Time Down Carry Having Having A Good Time Make Greatest Being Being Funny Strengths

Housekeeping ain't no joke. Louisa May Alcott

Joke Housekeeping

The more moral the people are in their business dealings, the less paperwork you need, the more handshakes you can have, the more the wheels of capitalism work better because there's trust in the marketplace. Business ethics is not a joke. And, in fact, I think most businesses that I've dealt with encourage exactly that type of behavior. Rick Santorum

Work You Capitalism Business Trust People Better Behavior Ethics Joke Think Type Marketplace Paperwork Moral Exactly More Fact Most Because Dealt Encourage Wheels In Fact Less Businesses Need

Joke Quotes

No more joke quotes