Lewis Black Quotes

Lewis Black
Lewis Black
American Comedian
Born: Aug 30, 1948
Funny Me People Think Time You
Related authors: George Carlin Groucho Marx Milton Berle Mitch Hedberg Robin Williams Rodney Dangerfield Steven Wright W. C. Fields
What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get that you have to have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense. Lewis Black
Love Day You Flu Valentines Day Sense Valentine Find Disturbing About No Sense Look Most Makes Get Holiday Height Season
Republicans have nothing but bad ideas and Democrats have no ideas. Lewis Black
Politics Nothing Bad Bad Ideas Ideas Democrats Republicans
The worst thing about Halloween is, of course, candy corn. It's unbelievable to me. Candy corn is the only candy in the history of America that's never been advertised. And there's a reason. All of the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911. And so, since nobody eats that stuff, every year there's a ton of it left over. Lewis Black
Me History Halloween Made Year Every Corn Worst Worst Thing Unbelievable Eats About Only Never Nobody Stuff Over Since Course Been Left America Candy The History Of Reason Ever Thing Ton
Do you know what 'meteorologist' means in English? It means liar. Lewis Black
You Liar Do You Know Know Meteorologist Means English
When it comes to idiots, America's got more than its fair share. If idiots were energy, it would be a source that would never run out. Lewis Black
Energy Out Run Would Would-Be More Never Share Fair Fair Share Idiots Got Were Source Than America
If you're going to vote for somebody because you think they have a great faith in God, you'd better be sure that God has faith in them. Lewis Black
God Faith Great You Vote Better Somebody Think Great Faith Sure Because Going Them
I believe that summer is our time, a time for the people, and that no politician should be allowed to speak to us during the summer. They can start talking again after Labor Day. Lewis Black
Time Day People Speak Labor Day Politician Believe Our Summer Our Time Allowed For The People Talking Labor After Again Us Should Start
Being a playwright is like the equivalent of doing a jigsaw puzzle that has 1,500 pieces, and it's a jigsaw of a blue sky. Not a cloud in sight. Lewis Black
Sky Cloud Playwright Jigsaw Jigsaw Puzzle Sight Puzzle Like Pieces Equivalent Doing Blue Blue Sky Being
Parenting isn't just parenting your own child. Lewis Black
Parenting Own Child Just Your
You're on Facebook, and these people seem to have endless lives. I don't have time to live my life, let alone tell you what I'm doing, or post a photo. Lewis Black
Life Alone Time You Facebook People Post My Life Live Photo Tell Seem Doing Endless Lives
One of the most important things, especially when you're leaving school, is to realize you're going to be dealing with a lot of idiots. And a lot of those idiots are in charge of things, so if you're in an interview and you really want to tell the person off, don't do it. Lewis Black
You School Important Important Things Interview Those Tell Charge Most Dealing Idiots Leaving Lot Off Person Going The Most Important Want Realize Really Things
Democrats should be focused on which way we can help the most people in this country, and Republicans should be focused on how to do that in the most fiscally responsible manner possible. Lewis Black
People Country Way Focused Possible Responsible Most Democrats How Fiscally Which Republicans Manner Should Help
You've got to be stupid to heckle me - I am very equipped to win. Lewis Black
Me You Win Stupid Got Am Equipped Very
Self-love is a big part of golf. Lewis Black
Big Part Self-Love Big Part Golf
Basically I wake up in the morning and I think everything's going to be great. I'm really kind of optimistic, and I look forward to a new day. I pick up 'The New York Times,' and I look at the front page and realize that once again I'm wrong. I start to fixate on stuff. Lewis Black
Day Great Morning Wake Up Think Everything Once Kind Pick Wrong Stuff New Look New Day Wake Up Optimistic Times York Front Going Front Page New York New York Times Again Realize Really Page Forward Start Basically
I don't understand how anybody's still a Democrat or a Republican. I don't know what they're basing it on. Lewis Black
Know Democrat Understand How Still Anybody Republican
I'm a happy person but an angry citizen. Lewis Black
Angry Happy Citizen Person Happy Person
Harry Reid is not funny; he's creepy. Nancy Pelosi is creepy. Charles Schumer is sneaky and creepy. Lewis Black
Funny Harry Harry Reid Charles He Nancy Nancy Pelosi Sneaky Reid Creepy
I love anything that gets me outside of my own head. Lewis Black
Love Me Own My Own Outside Head Gets Anything
Online, there's no time. It's always Christmas. Lewis Black
Christmas Time Online No Time Always
I'm not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I'm not. Lewis Black
Great Joke Say Writer Comic Odd Which
If we're not going to tax the rich anymore, we're going to create class warfare. Lewis Black
Class Rich Class Warfare Going Tax Anymore Warfare Create
You got to be just stupid to not be focused on alternative energy. Lewis Black
You Stupid Energy Focused Alternative Got Just
I watch some CNN and a lot of Fox, because it helps me get irritated. Lewis Black
Me Some Because Lot Get Irritated Helps Watch Fox
The fear of health care changing is beyond belief. Like there's a way to make the system worse. Really? Lewis Black
Health Fear Care Changing Way Worse System Like Beyond Make Health Care Really Belief
I've got stress like anybody else, and it builds up during the day. Like, I'll be trying to do something on the computer, and I'll get stuck, so I go to the help section. And it just enrages me, because why even call it a help section at all? There's nothing in any way 'helpful' about it. Lewis Black
Day Me Stress Nothing Else Way Section About Something Computer Stuck Like Call Because Builds Got Go Up Get Trying Any Just Anybody Anybody Else Help Helpful Even Why
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