95 Toilet Quotes for You to Enjoy

Oh, I've never gone off into that 'the room's not the right temperature, take this tea back' stuff. I still scrub my own toilet and vacuum the carpet, and I have to be able to push my trolley around Morrisons and do my shopping. Rob Halford

The first thing I did when I decided that I was going to dive into the world of poop was look at who was doing stuff in that world. The first I came across was the World Toilet Organization. So one of the first things I did was to go to their annual show in Moscow. Rose George

World Organization First Dive Stuff Moscow Look Annual First Thing First Things Doing Came Go Did Going The First Thing Decided Across Toilet Show Who Thing Things

The average human being spends three years of life going to the toilet, though the average human being with no physical toilet to go to probably does his or her best to spend less. It is a human behavior that is as revealing as any other about human nature, but only if it can be released from the social straitjacket of nicety. Rose George

Life Best Nature Human Being Behavior Three Human Nature Other Spend Released Though Physical About Only Revealing Does Go His Years Any Going Human Being Human Behavior Social Average Toilet Less Her

Paris's neighborhoods, the arrondissements, are organized like a twist. They spiral from the river like toilet water flushing in reverse and erupting out of the bowl - a corkscrew or what have you, a flattened pig's tail, a whorling braid notched one to 20. Rosecrans Baldwin

You Water Neighborhoods Out Spiral Paris Tail River Like Bowl Pig Reverse Flattened Toilet Organized Twist

Hate American toilets with only toilet paper and no bidets. Shenaz Treasury

Hate Toilets Paper Only American Toilet Toilet Paper

There are some ghost stories in Japan where - when you are sitting in the bathroom in the traditional style of the Japanese toilet - a hand is actually starting to grab you from beneath. It's a very scary story. Shigeru Miyamoto

My dad always jokes that we should have a reality TV show because my friends and I pull crazy stunts, like putting Saran Wrap on the toilet. Sofia Richie

Crazy Jokes Reality TV TV Show Wrap Putting Like Stunts Because Always Friends Reality TV Should Toilet Show Dad Pull

Me and my sisters were so awful. One nanny, we loved, but we hacked her email and sent her boyfriend lots of weird messages, and we once actually locked her in the toilet, too. Suki Waterhouse

Me Too Once Email Locked Hacked Weird Nanny Messages Boyfriend Were Lots Sisters Loved Sent Toilet Her Actually Awful

I quite enjoy fame, especially when you go to conventions in America where they treat you like a god with stretch limos and the whole fame thing, but then when you come back to Britain, you end up changing in a toilet in a theatre off West End and that's really good, because that is what it's about. Sylvester McCoy

God Good You Theatre Treat Enjoy Changing Back About Come Like Because Go West Off End Fame Up Fame Thing America Quite Where Conventions Then Really Toilet Whole Thing Britain Stretch

I didn't go to high school. I think that after you learn to read and write and do your numbers and flush the toilet behind yourself, you don't need no more schoolin'. You need to get out in the water and swim. Wilford Brimley

Here in the Netherlands there are towns that take part in the throwing of toilet bowls for a laugh. Willem-Alexander of the Netherlands

Laugh Netherlands Take Throwing Part Towns Bowls Toilet Here

Being on the toilet stool is the grossest thing there is, to me. John Witherspoon

Me Stool Being Toilet Thing

I think it's weird going to the toilet in clothes. I don't like it. Rylan Clark-Neal

Clothes Think I Think Weird Like Going Toilet

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