Jokes Quotes

I'm obsessed with reality TV anyway - I use my knowledge of that stuff to make jokes on Twitter and Facebook to get more people to sign up to be fans. Lisa Lampanelli
Knowledge Jokes Facebook Reality People Fans Twitter Twitter And Facebook Sign TV More More People Obsessed Stuff Make Up Get Anyway Reality TV Use
I am a crazy online shopper. My husband always jokes, 'Another box arrived!' Airplanes used to be my sanctuary for reading books, but now I have to peruse Gilt sales. Lisa Ling
Crazy Jokes Husband Reading Books Airplane Gilt Online Box Another Reading Books Always Am Arrived Sales Sanctuary Used Now
I've seen Don Rickles up at the Montreal Comedy Festival. Don Rickles was doing jokes in a wheelchair, and he was headlining a show. Do you think they would let a woman do that? Loni Love
You Jokes Woman Comedy Seen Think Montreal Would He Doing Up Festival Wheelchair Show
I have about 1,000 hours of myself on tape in a vault in Los Angeles. But I also have a photographic memory about my jokes, because they're really about me; they're my stories. Louie Anderson
Myself Me Jokes Memory Photographic Angeles About Vault Hours Also Because Los Los Angeles Tape Stories Really
My driver Kellie Frost and I would race these fellows home and they were always faster on the highway. We did the same with Daniel and his driver, and thus began a long series of jokes and competitions to alleviate the impossible hours and tensions this film provoked. Madeleine Stowe
Home Jokes Impossible Long Faster Daniel Would Alleviate Driver Long Series Tensions Thus Highway Hours Fellows Always Were His Began Provoked Did Same Frost Race Series Film Competitions
I never was shy, but as far as telling jokes, I'm the worst. I like physical comedy; it's where I feel comfortable. Malin Akerman
Jokes Comedy Worst Telling Physical Physical Comedy Never Feel Like Comfortable Where As Far As Far Shy
Jokes about my surname aren't a big deal at all. In fact, that's what jokes are meant for - you laugh and then forget about it. Manushi Chhillar
You Jokes Big Laugh About Fact Deal Big Deal Forget In Fact Then Meant
Humor has the tendency to be funny once. If I tell you a joke, we're going to have a big laugh. But the second time I tell the joke, it's going to be a bit strange, and the third time you're going to ask if there's something wrong with me. So I am very cautious with jokes, but there is a lightness in my work. Marcel Wanders
Work Funny Time Me You Jokes Strange Humor Joke Big Once Bit Laugh Tell Something Tendency Wrong Lightness Am Cautious Very Going Ask Second Third
Nine out of 10 English chefs have their names on their chests. Who do they think they are? They're dreamers. They're jokes. Marco Pierre White
Jokes Dreamers Think Nine Out Names Chefs Chest English Who
The thing about all good horror movies is that the fans expect a couple of inside jokes. Maybe I'm supposed to be saying how terrified I was while making it, but it was really fun. Margot Kidder
Saying Good Jokes Fans Inside About Horror Horror Movies Supposed Couple Terrified How Making Expect Maybe While Movies Really Fun Thing
Jokes are grievances. Marshall McLuhan
Jokes
I love Los Angeles. I love when people make fun of it. I think, 'Good, don't come.' All the jokes about it feel out of date. Mary McCormack
Love Good Jokes People Think Out Angeles About Date Feel Come Make Los Los Angeles Fun
Our solution on 'The Simpsons' is to do jokes that people who have an education, or some frame of reference, can get. And for the ones who don't, it doesn't matter, because we have Homer banging his head and saying, 'D'oh!' Matt Groening
Education Saying Jokes People Matter Frame Our Solution Some Head Simpsons Because His Reference Get Banging The Simpsons Who Homer
I love the idea that we put in jokes the kids don't get. And that later, when they grow up and read a few books and go to college and watch the show again, they can get it on a completely different level. Matt Groening
Love Jokes College Few Books Later Kids Put Idea Read Go Up Get Different Again Different Level Show Grow Grow Up Level Watch
I'm here to make people laugh and help them forget their troubles, too! So I just try to bring heart and bring jokes! Matthew Moy
Jokes Heart People Try Too Laugh Troubles Make Forget Just Them Help Bring Here
I need a woman to have a quirky sense of humor. There's a bunch of jokes I use, and if she doesn't get them, she's probably not for me. Matthew Perry
Me Jokes Woman Sense Of Humor Humor Sense She Bunch Get Quirky Them Use Need
I've made enough jokes about Iran's leadership that I'm sure if I showed up that I would get a nice escort - to the main prison - and then I could do a show there. Maz Jobrani
Leadership Jokes Made Prison Nice Enough Would About Could Main Sure Iran Up Escort Get Then Show
I think very long and hard about every possibly offensive joke I want to make. I really hate mean humor and would hate to make anyone reading my jokes feel truly bad. Megan Amram
Jokes Hate Humor Long Joke Reading Every Think Possibly Bad Would About Feel Make Truly Very Offensive Want Anyone Mean Really Hard
I loved Woody Allen's short pieces. I was equally influenced by Woody Allen and Norman Mailer. I was very into this idea of being high-low, of being serious and intellectual but also making really broad jokes. Meghan Daum
Jokes Broad Allen Idea Pieces Also Equally Making Intellectual Very Norman Norman Mailer Short Being Influenced Loved Woody Woody Allen Really Serious
Now, you can bring up the past, but anybody can bring up the past. Even my daughter brings up the past sometimes. She makes a lot of jokes about the things that I've done. Metta World Peace
You Jokes Sometimes Daughter Past About She Makes Lot Up Done Anybody Even Now Things Bring Brings
Good clothes are good clothes, and they don't need whales and tricks and too many jokes. Sometimes you just need something to wear. Michael Bastian
Good You Jokes Sometimes Clothes Too Tricks Wear Something Whales Just Many Need
To deliver something deadpan is very difficult; I don't think people know how hard those jokes are. Michael Che
Jokes People Difficult Think Those Something Deliver Know How Very Hard
I definitely script things out. I definitely write things down and try to write jokes. Often, they're terrible. I often write terrible, terrible jokes. Michael Ian Black
Jokes Try Down Definitely Out Write Terrible Often Script Things
If you have doubts about someone, lay on a couple of jokes. If he doesn't find anything funny, your radar should be screaming. Then I would say be patient with people who are negative, because they're really having a hard time. Michael J. Fox
Funny Time You Jokes People Negative Be Patient Patient Say Would Find About Someone Having Lay He Couple Because Screaming Anything Then Really Should Your Doubts Radar Hard Who Hard Time
I think you make better jokes when you don't break logic for the joke, unless you make a movie just about jokes. Michael Lehmann
You Jokes Better Joke Think Unless Logic About Make Just Movie Break
On Anzac Day, coffee and jokes with a Turk might be the most meaningful and fair dinkum dawn service you could possibly have. Michael Leunig
Service Day You Jokes Coffee Possibly Could Dawn Fair Most Might Meaningful
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