106 Funeral Quotes for You to Enjoy

If I were to die today, I would be nervous about what people would say at my funeral. I would be happy if they said things like, 'He was a nice guy' or, 'He was occasionally decent' or, 'Mike wasn't as bad as a lot of people.' Mike Yaconelli

Today Be Happy Happy People Nervous Nice Say Bad Would Would-Be About Guy He Like Occasionally Said Were Lot Die Decent Mike Nice Guy Things Funeral

When I was a kid, I would fantasize about my own funeral. Noah Baumbach

Own Kid Would About My Own Fantasize Funeral

Depression Grief Communicate Guilt Sense Alcohol Side Addition Taboo About Similar General Resulting Somewhat Consumption Industry Another Acceptable Practices Effects Customers Communities Less Funeral Alert

An obituary should be an exercise in contemporary history, not a funeral oration. Peter Utley

History Obituary Contemporary Exercise Should Funeral

My father died in France, and my sisters and I went over with my mum to bring back his body. I remember going to the funeral parlour in France and being given a laminated menu of coffins, and thinking, surely there is an ice cream at the back of here! Rachel Joyce

Sometimes, when full and in fear that I will continue to eat unwanted food just because it's staring at me, I will place my napkin over the remaining portion. This is what I frequently refer to as a 'food funeral.' Rachel Nichols

'Selfie' is the word du jour, and it became cause celebre at Nelson Mandela's funeral when the Danish Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt took a selfie with U.S. President Barack Obama and U.K. Prime Minister David Cameron. Richard Quest

Cause Word President President Barack Obama Took Danish Minister Nelson Obama David David Cameron Prime Prime Minister Became Cameron Mandela Barack Barack Obama Funeral

Many old music hall fans were present at the funeral today of Fred 'Chuckles' Jenkins, Britain's oldest and unfunniest comedian. In tribute, the vicar read out one of Fred's jokes, and the congregation had two minutes silence. Ronnie Barker

Today Music Silence Jokes Old Fans Out Tribute Fred Minutes Had Comedian Read Hall Were Vicar Old Music Congregation Many Oldest Present Funeral Britain Two

What you need is one black dress I call Plan B. It doesn't have to be fabulous, it just looks good, covers up the problems and is neutral enough for dinner, business, a date, a funeral. You don't overwear it, you don't overwash it, because the Plan B is - gold. Salma Hayek

The formal Washington dinner party has all the spontaneity of a Japanese imperial funeral. Simon Hoggart

Dinner Party Dinner Party Imperial Spontaneity Formal Japanese Washington Funeral

When my mother died, my father was in a crisis, my sister was in a crisis, everyone was in a crisis. I went round the night my mother was lying in the kitchen, and I organised everything, from the undertaker to the funeral... I looked after everybody, I sorted it all out and I've done so ever since. Stuart Rose

Mother Father Sister Lying Everybody Everyone Everything Crisis Out All-Out Kitchen Since Looked Sorted Undertaker Died Done After Organised Round Ever Funeral Night

I had this struggle of, what do I do to make sure my brother is still part of everything that I do? As I was driving up to his funeral, it hit me. I'm going to wear his number. Taysom Hill

Me Struggle Everything Wear Brother Had Driving Part Make Sure Still His Up Hit Going Funeral Number

That's the most terrible thing about being an author - standing there at your mother's funeral, but you don't switch the author off. So your own innermost thoughts are grist for the mill. Who was it said - one of the famous lady novelists - 'unhappy is the family that contains an author'? Terry Pratchett

Family Thoughts You Mother Unhappy Own About Contains Most Terrible Terrible Thing Said Off Author Being Famous Lady Your Standing Who Novelists Switch Mill Thing Funeral Innermost

I wanted to make a human monster. His name is Coffin Baby. The idea is based on a group of people from Pasadena whose names I can't mention. His mother died and during the funeral, this baby came out of her in the coffin. Tobe Hooper

I grew up in the suburbs of a small town on the south coast where the only opportunity I ever got to wear anything smart was a funeral, so I had never owned a piece of clothing worth more than £40. Tom Odell

Worth Smart Opportunity Wear More Only Small Never Had Small Town Town Piece Got South Up Than Owned Where Clothing Grew Anything Suburbs Coast Ever Funeral

I've always said I would want to be a funeral director if I wasn't an actor. Torrey DeVitto

Director Would Said Always Want Actor Funeral

Love is the funeral of hearts. Ville Valo

Love Love Is Hearts Funeral

I wouldn't want my funeral to be a sad, sappy thing. Vinnie Paul

Sad Want Sappy Thing Funeral

I delayed my father's funeral because of cricket. Virat Kohli

Father Cricket Delayed Because Funeral

A man is known by his works. That I have heard at many a funeral. Winslow Homer

Man Known His Heard Many Works Funeral

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