21 Comedy Club Quotes for You to Enjoy

With stand-up, I can have an idea, go down the street to a comedy club and work on it, flesh it out, book a venue, people will come, then film it. I do all that myself; I never have to answer to anybody. Aziz Ansari

Science was always a passion, but I also loved 'Monty Python' and 'The Young Ones,' and I discovered the Footlights comedy club at university, where a lot of those people got their start. I had a go and loved it immediately. After that, I just couldn't stop writing sketches, and it all took off from there. Ben Miller

Science People Writing Comedy Passion Young Club Took Monty Monty Python Immediately Those Had Python Also Comedy Club Always Got Go Discovered Lot Off Just Stop Where After Loved Sketches Start University

Comedy club audiences pay up to $25 per person and another fistful of cash to cover a two-drink minimum, so when they don't like something, they let you know - with silence. Chris Hardwick

Silence You Comedy Club Pay Minimum Per Cash Something Like Know Comedy Club Another Audiences Cover Up Person

If I find a comedy club where no one's camera works, I'll go. Chris Rock

Comedy Club Find Comedy Club Go Camera Where Works

TV is easier: it's all planned out for you, and the audience is there to see a show and they are all pumped up, but when you are in a comedy club, you have to be really funny to win them over. To me, that's more pure. Drew Carey

When I was a child, I wanted to watch things that made me laugh. It's attacking boredom, as simple as that. I was 19 when I first went to a comedy club - I wanted to do it, so I gave it a try and that was it. I found my office. Dylan Moran

Me Simple Comedy Try Made First Club Gave Laugh Boredom Attacking Comedy Club Child Office Wanted Found Things Watch

I grew up in Iowa, and the improv comedy club Comedy-Sportz across the river in Illinois held auditions. They took me even though I was only 16 - you really had to be 18, but they never checked me for ID. Eric Christian Olsen

Some comedians tell nice jokes that you can tell to your kids. Some use bad words - they work 'blue.' If you don't want to hear a joke that's blue, you shouldn't go to a comedy club where a comedian who makes blue jokes is performing. Gilbert Gottfried

Work You Jokes Words Comedy Joke Club Nice Kids Tell Bad Some Performing Comedian Comedians Comedy Club Makes Go Hear Blue Where Want Use Your Who

I did a gig at a comedy club in Bournemouth where they served a buffet while the acts were on. There was the clang of people carving turkey during the set. If you put comedy and turkey side by side, turkey always wins. Jack Whitehall

As an ex-stand up, I can tell you that a comedy club isn't a place you go looking to get the abuse you just can't seem to find in daily life. The stage is a performer's domain. You protect that domain. You are not on stage to take what's given just 'cause you're getting paid. If you are attacked, you retaliate. John Ridley

Life Daily You Comedy Cause Looking Stage Club Tell Find Seem Given Attacked Take Retaliate Performer Abuse Protect Comedy Club Go Domain Up Get Getting Just Place Paid Daily Life

I thought 'Garfunkel and Oates' would be too confusing, but it ended up being confusing in the best of ways because the first time we played a comedy club, it was because they thought we were the real Garfunkel and Oates. Kate Micucci

I started doing little amateur nights at the comedy club that was right next to the restaurant that I waitressed in when I was in university. I was probably 22 years old. I didn't do it with any intention of making a career out of it; I had just always valued comedy. Katherine Ryan

Comedy Old Club Nights Valued Out Restaurant Had Comedy Club Always Making Amateur Doing Years Any Intention Just Little Next Right Started Career University

I think it's great training for any comedian to start on cows. Because with cows, you expect them to be bored and just stare at you blankly. And that's exactly what you'll get at a comedy club. If you can toughen up with a cow audience, then you'll never be worried with a human audience. Kristen Schaal

Great You Training Comedy Club Think Worried Exactly Bored Exactly What Toughen Never Comedian Comedy Club Because Audience Cow Up Cows Expect Get Any Human Just Them Then Stare Start

I went to a performance-art high school, and a teacher there was signing me up for open-mic nights at the comedy club. I think about it now, and I think, 'Well, that may be inappropriate,' but it was great!' Margaret Cho

Teacher Great Me School Comedy Club Think Nights High Signing High School About Comedy Club Well Up May Inappropriate Now

I think the process of 'SNL' is still pretty formal. You make an audition tape, your agent sends it in, they watch people's tapes, and then they invite people to perform at a comedy club in Los Angeles or New York. But I don't know how much actual scouting they do online. Noel Wells

You People Comedy Club Think Pretty Angeles Online Perform Invite New Know Comedy Club Make How Still Audition How Much Los Los Angeles Tape Tapes SNL Scouting York Sends New York Formal Process Agent Then Much Your Actual Watch

Kids are the ultimate trump card: a way to get out of co-op board meetings or lunch with a friend you don't want to see or your brother-in-law's set at a comedy club. It's fair to use your kids as an excuse to sidestep what you don't want to do; it's less fair to blame them for not being able to achieve what you do want to do. Rumaan Alam

You Blame Comedy Achieve Club Lunch Meetings Way Kids Out See Able Brother-In-Law Fair Excuse Comedy Club Ultimate Trump Friend Get Being Want Board Them Use Your Less Card Set

I very rarely laugh. I remember I used to have a joy at comedy. I remember going to see Sean Lock for the first time live, just in some comedy club when I was 18, and again, just guttural, pure laughter. I didn't know what he was doing; I couldn't see the tricks. Stephen Merchant

Time Joy Remember Comedy Laughter Pure First Club Live Lock Laugh Tricks See Rarely Some He Know Comedy Club First Time Doing Very Going Just Again Used Sean

No one set that I ever do is the same. I mean, if I go to a comedy club, and I perform three sets, all three sets are different because anything can happen in between sets. Tracy Morgan

Comedy Three Club Sets No-One Perform Between Comedy Club Because Go Same Different Happen Anything In-Between Mean Ever Set