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Spike Milligan Quotes
Spike Milligan Quotes
Spike Milligan
Irish
Comedian
Born:
Apr 16
,
1918
Died:
Feb 27
,
2002
Father
He
Life
Me
Remember
You
Related authors:
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
Milton Berle
Mitch Hedberg
Robin Williams
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
W. C. Fields
A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
Spike Milligan
Sit
Tree
Sure
Cure
My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
Spike Milligan
Me
Father
Had
He
Influence
Lunatic
Profound
Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
Spike Milligan
Happiness
Buy
You
Money
Pleasant
More
Misery
Does
Form
Bring
And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.
Spike Milligan
God
Light
Wait
Would
He
Thursday
Until
Said
Board
Electricity
Connected
I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.
Spike Milligan
Just
Afraid
Want
Dying
Happens
I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
Spike Milligan
Thought
Reading
Mine
Poem
Shakespeare
Never
He
Reads
Begin
Any
Then
Should
Why
I have resigned from the human race. Look at the way we treat animals.
Spike Milligan
Treat
Animals
Way
Look
Human
Race
Human Race
Resigned
As I kept having episodes of depression, I realized that it was not a one-off: that I had, well, not a disease, really - more an illness.
Spike Milligan
Depression
Having
More
Had
Well
Disease
Realized
Really
Episodes
Illness
Kept
I don't think of depression as contagious. Other depressed people challenge the idea - which can be very persistent and irritating - that there is something odd about you: that you are unique with regard to this wretched state.
Spike Milligan
Depression
You
People
Challenge
Think
Other
State
About
Something
Wretched
Contagious
Idea
Odd
Very
Persistent
Regard
Irritating
Which
Depressed
Unique
For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and finally with a piece of string.
Spike Milligan
Finally
String
Ruled
Ten
Ten Years
Foot
Caesar
Piece
Years
Hand
Iron
Wooden
Then
When I get depressed, I try to get something for the terrible sadness that comes over me and create something in terms of poetry.
Spike Milligan
Me
Sadness
Try
Something
Poetry
Over
Terms
Terrible
Get
Depressed
Create
I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
Spike Milligan
Health
Old
Year
Year-Old
Fridge
Eighteen
Body
Keep
Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
Spike Milligan
You
Come
Quietly
Going
Use
Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.
Spike Milligan
Worn
Perfect
Order
Anything
Working
I remember lying out in my bed and looking at the vast, quiet sky. Right up above my head, there were three stars in a row, and I remember thinking, 'Well, I'll have those three stars all my life, and wherever I am, they will be. They are my stars, and they belong to me.'
Spike Milligan
Life
Me
Remember
Sky
Will
Three
My Life
Looking
Stars
Thinking
Lying
Those
All My Life
Out
Above
Vast
Head
Well
Bed
Am
Were
Up
Quiet
Wherever
Right
Row
Belong
The lunacy continues and has every chance of becoming a way of life unless we stop it soon. Men are getting so used to wars that the psychiatric wing of the RAMC are planning how to break the news to the men when the war is over.
Spike Milligan
Life
War
News
Men
Every
Unless
Way
Wing
Soon
Over
Becoming
How
Getting
Stop
Psychiatric
Break
Used
Planning
Wars
Lunacy
Every Chance
Chance
We come across thirty or so hurried graves with makeshift wooden markers. 'Private Edwards, E.', a number, and that was all. Fourteen days ago he was alive, thinking feeling, hoping... If war was a game of cards, I'd say someone was cheating.
Spike Milligan
War
Game
Cheating
Feeling
Thinking
Thirty
Markers
Say
Alive
Hoping
Someone
He
Days
Come
Private
Wooden
Across
Graves
Cards
Fourteen
Number
I am afraid that, like Timon of Athens, I just cannot let go of my friendships.
Spike Milligan
Athens
Like
Am
Go
Friendships
Just
Afraid
Cannot
Let Go
My father being a soldier, every time I saw soldiers marching - 'Well,' I thought, 'my father's that,' and these soldiers were always looking magnificent. And I thought they were powerful; they were all-powerful. I knew that they were an elite in India.
Spike Milligan
Time
Father
Thought
Looking
Every
Every Time
Saw
Soldier
Soldiers
India
All-Powerful
Magnificent
Knew
Powerful
Well
Always
Were
Being
Marching
Elite
It was implanted in me that I came from a different class - an elevated class. I was cushioned by servants. I don't remember doing anything for myself. I only played and went to school.
Spike Milligan
Myself
Me
Class
Remember
School
Only
Doing
Came
Different
Anything
Cushioned
Servants
Elevated
Played
Things began to improve when I went to Rangoon. To begin with, my father was promoted, which meant he was at home more. The matriarchal society was ended, and for the first time, I went to a boys' school.
Spike Milligan
Time
Home
School
Father
First
Society
Promoted
More
He
First Time
Boy
Began
Begin
Improve
Ended
Which
Meant
Things
My father was a soldier, which meant that he was a warrior, which meant that he was important. My mother rode a horse and sang in the Governor-General's band, so that made her important as well.
Spike Milligan
Mother
Father
Made
Important
Band
Warrior
Soldier
Horse
He
Well
Rode
Which
Meant
Sang
Her
You couldn't enclose people in institutions or hospitals or almshouses in the way the Victorians managed to do. India was too big. Seeing the suffering people was terrible, but I think I was more distraught at the needless cruelty to so many animals.
Spike Milligan
You
Suffering
People
Animals
Cruelty
Big
Think
Needless
Too
Way
India
Seeing
More
Hospitals
Institutions
Terrible
Enclose
Many
May 8th 1943. Deluge. The rain not only fell mainly on the plain in Spain; it also fell mainly on the back of the bloody neck, dripping down the spine into the socks where it came out of the lace-holes in the boots.
Spike Milligan
Rain
Down
Back
Out
Boots
Spine
Only
Dripping
Deluge
Mainly
Fell
Also
Came
Bloody
May
Where
Spain
Plain
Neck
Socks
I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke.
Spike Milligan
Me
Somebody
Joke
Singing
Harry
Spent
Laughing
Until
Years
Many
It was a perfect marriage. She didn't want to and he couldn't.
Spike Milligan
Marriage
Perfect
He
She
Want
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