Robert Benchley Quotes

Robert Benchley

Robert Benchley

American Comedian

Born: Sep 15, 1889

Died: Nov 21, 1945

Before Children Man People Time You

Related authors: George Carlin Groucho Marx Milton Berle Mitch Hedberg Robin Williams Rodney Dangerfield Steven Wright W. C. Fields

Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of. Robert Benchley

You Will Phobias Tell Afraid Us Your

Great literature must spring from an upheaval in the author's soul. If that upheaval is not present then it must come from the works of any other author which happens to be handy and easily adapted. Robert Benchley

Great Soul Spring Other Easily Must Great Literature Come Author Upheaval Handy Any Happens Literature Which Then Works Present Adapted

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other. Robert Benchley

Pet Stretched Other Way One-Way Small Small Children Ideal Dogs Child Children Cannot Length Much Pulled Harm

Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about. Robert Benchley

Argument Party Fall Neither About Fact Somewhat Most Knows Talking Am Opponent Nor Impressive Owing Short Being Which

Opera is where a guy gets stabbed in the back, and instead of dying, he sings. Robert Benchley

Back Guy He Instead Opera Sings Gets Where Dying

The freelance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps. Robert Benchley

Man Word Freelance Per Writer Perhaps Piece Paid Who

Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony. Robert Benchley

People Drinking Fools Compounding Felony Makes Begin

There is a note in the front of the volume saying that no public reading may be given without first getting the author's permission. It ought to be made much more difficult to do than that. Robert Benchley

Saying Made First Reading Difficult Ought Given More Volume Without Permission Than Author Front Getting May Public Note Much

I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry. Robert Benchley

Death Myself Slow Drinking Hurry Know Then

Even nowadays a man can't step up and kill a woman without feeling just a bit unchivalrous. Robert Benchley

Man Woman Feeling Nowadays Bit Step Without Up Just Even

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