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Bob Newhart Quotes
Bob Newhart Quotes
Bob Newhart
American
Comedian
Born:
Sep 5
,
1929
Comedy
Me
People
Think
Work
You
Related authors:
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
Milton Berle
Mitch Hedberg
Robin Williams
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
W. C. Fields
I don't know how doctors pick one specialty over another. Some you can understand. Pediatricians. Or gynecologists delivering babies, bringing a new life into the world, but how does someone want to be a proctologist? How can you fall in love with proctology?
Bob Newhart
Life
Love
You
World
New Life
Doctors
Fall
Babies
Some
Someone
Delivering
Pick
Over
New
Know
Another
Understand
Does
How
Want
Specialty
Bringing
I am one of the great wasters of time. I have made it an art form. I can get up at 8 o'clock in the morning, be out of the house by 8:30 and back by 5 P.M., and I'll be going all day long and accomplish absolutely nothing. It's an amazing talent.
Bob Newhart
Art
Time
Day
Great
Morning
Amazing
Made
Long
Nothing
Back
All Day
Out
Absolutely
Absolutely Nothing
Talent
House
Am
Accomplish
Art Form
Up
Get
Going
Form
When I started out in 1960, I thought it might possibly last a couple of years. I never expected it to last 42. I take great satisfaction in that longevity.
Bob Newhart
Great
Thought
Out
Possibly
Take
Never
Longevity
Couple
Years
Expected
Might
Satisfaction
Started
Last
The first time I got up in front of an audience was terror, abject terror, which continued for another four or five years. There still is, a little bit.
Bob Newhart
Time
First
Bit
Abject
Another
First Time
Terror
Audience
Got
Still
Continue
Years
Up
Five
Front
Which
Little
Little Bit
Four
Jack Benny was, without a doubt, the bravest comedian I have ever seen work. He wasn't afraid of silence. He would take as long as it took to tell the story.
Bob Newhart
Work
Silence
Long
Seen
Doubt
Took
Benny
Tell
Would
Take
He
Comedian
Without
Jack
Jack Benny
Bravest
Afraid
Story
Ever
I'm very open to the up-and-comers.
Bob Newhart
Open
Very
I was influenced by every comedian I ever saw work. That's the only way you learn how to do it.
Bob Newhart
Work
You
Every
Saw
Way
Only
Comedian
Learn
How
Influenced
Ever
I don't know how many sacred cows there are today. I think there's a little confusion between humor and gross passing for humor. That's kind of regrettable.
Bob Newhart
Today
Confusion
Humor
Think
Kind
Sacred
Sacred Cows
Between
Know
How
Passing
Cows
Little
Regrettable
Gross
Many
I love portraying the totally indifferent person.
Bob Newhart
Love
Totally
Indifferent
Person
Portraying
There are some actresses that can't do comedy; it's too heavy-handed.
Bob Newhart
Comedy
Too
Some
Heavy-Handed
Actress
I don't have a stack of scripts that, when I get home, studios are clamoring, saying, 'Has Bob read ours yet?'
Bob Newhart
Saying
Home
Ours
Studios
Read
Get
Stack
Scripts
Bob
I have no intention of retiring; I can't imagine not doing stand-up. That's where I started and where I'll be.
Bob Newhart
No Intention
Retiring
Doing
Intention
Where
Started
Imagine
Don Rickles and I are best friends. I know that might seem strange to those who know Don only by reputation, but somebody has to be his friend. Just to make sure I don't forget, Don gave me a doormat that sits just outside the front door of my house. It reads: 'The Newharts: The Rickleses Best Friends.'
Bob Newhart
Best
Me
Strange
Somebody
Reputation
Gave
Those
Seem
Only
Outside
Know
House
Make
Sure
Reads
His
Friend
Friends
Forget
Front
Front Door
Just
Door
Doormat
Might
Who
I have to warn you, I'm not just some sitcom guy. I'm now an author.
Bob Newhart
You
Some
Guy
Author
Sitcom
Just
Warn
Now
One time I happened to use the word 'denigrate' onstage, and it didn't get any reaction. So as I continued my act, the left side of my brain was fast-forwarding to see if I had any other big words coming up.
Bob Newhart
Time
Words
Word
Big
Other
Side
One Time
See
Onstage
Had
Reaction
Coming
Continue
Brain
Denigrate
Left
Up
Get
Any
Happened
Act
Use
I don't know how to do a show not in front of a live audience.
Bob Newhart
Live
Live Audience
Know
Audience
How
Front
Show
I think the thing about it is when you grow up in Chicago there's such a thing as putting on airs, you know? And you just learn not to put on airs. Don't act like, 'Oh boy, I'm somebody.' They'll slap you down.
Bob Newhart
You
Somebody
Down
Think
About
Put
Putting
Like
Know
Learn
Boy
Chicago
Up
Oh
Just
Act
Such A Thing
Grow
Grow Up
Slap
Thing
I don't think too much about age. Maybe if you're hurting, aching and arthritic, then you think about it a lot. But I don't.
Bob Newhart
You
Age
Too Much
Think
Too
Hurting
About
Lot
Maybe
Aching
Then
Much
There is an edginess in my work that people don't always recognize.
Bob Newhart
Work
People
Recognize
Always
Stand-up is different from television. In stand-up, you've got to be in control.
Bob Newhart
You
Control
Television
Got
Different
A lot of money is spent trying to keep people alive who don't necessarily want to be alive.
Bob Newhart
People
Money
Spent
Alive
Lot
Trying
Want
Who
Keep
Necessarily
When I was off TV, people would ask me to please come back, which I think was their way of saying, 'There's nothing out there for us.'
Bob Newhart
Saying
Me
People
Nothing
Think
Back
Please
Way
Out
TV
Would
Come
Off
Which
Ask
Us
I just don't think most people put myself and Robert Frost in the same category.
Bob Newhart
Myself
People
Think
Put
Category
Most
Robert
Robert Frost
Same
Just
Frost
I would say I came from upper middle class family.
Bob Newhart
Family
Class
Say
Would
Class Family
Came
Upper
Middle
Middle Class
Dick Martin, if you put a gun to his forehead, he couldn't tell you a joke.
Bob Newhart
You
Gun
Joke
Tell
Martin
He
Put
Forehead
His
I can't do a one-camera show. I don't know how to do that kind of show where you count in your head and then you do the next line.
Bob Newhart
You
Kind
Count
Head
Know
How
Line
Where
Then
Next
Your
Show
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