Quotes by Comedians

After I graduated, I tried Broadway, which was difficult for me. It was tough to get a part on Broadway, so I just started talking to audiences at different social gatherings, and little by little I became Don Rickles - whatever that is. Don Rickles

Johnny Carson was a big influence on me - all of those shows I did with him over the years, like, 100 of them, they made a bit of a name for me at the time, so that part of my life was very good. Don Rickles

I couldn't sell air conditioners on a 98-degree day. When I demonstrated them in a showroom, I pushed the wrong button and blew the circuit. Don Rickles

Day Air Circuit Pushed Wrong Blew Sell Them Button

My grandchildren just know me now as Mr. Potato Head. Don Rickles

Me Potato Head Know Just Grandchildren Now

When I walk down the street in New York, I swear to God, the building constructor, the guy pounding cement and what not, will yell, 'Hey, you hockey puck!' Don Rickles

God You Walk Will Building Down Hey Guy Pounding New Yell York Cement Hockey New York Swear Street Puck

I say things I get away with, and it becomes a joke. Don Rickles

Joke Say Becomes Get Away Things

I've never gone to comedy clubs. Don Rickles

Comedy Gone Never Clubs

Half the battle is that people have to like you before you say one joke, one bit of humor. Don Rickles

You Battle People Humor Joke Half Before Say Bit Like

The young comedians always ask me, 'What's the secret for staying around?' I tell them, 'There is no secret - just stay around. Longevity is the most important thing.' Don Rickles

Everything I've performed has been from my own head. Don Rickles

Own Everything Has-Been My Own Head Performed Been

I was always the guy who made jokes and ribbed people at parties. After I went to the American Academy of Dramatic Arts I got sidetracked into clubs and started doing comedy. Don Rickles

Jokes People Comedy Made Dramatic Sidetracked Guy Academy Parties Always Got Doing American Arts After Clubs Who Started

I was a big shot in high school - big into social events and at the dramatic society - and I always had trouble in school. Not because I was a dummy, but I was always busy being the Jackson Heights clown. Don Rickles

My mother was a big influence. She kept pushing me because I was very shy and inhibited. And schoolwork was very difficult for me because I couldn't concentrate. I was failing almost every subject. To this day, I'm not too good at reading a book. But I was the president of my high school comedy group, and they treated me like a king. Don Rickles

Good Day Me Book School Comedy Mother King Big Reading Group Difficult Every Too President High High School Pushing Almost Failing Concentrate Like Schoolwork She Because Subject Big Influence Very Influence Inhibited Shy Treated Kept

One thing a comedian does, when you step on the stage, you're selling yourself, and certainly I don't think the whole world can love you. But if you can get the majority on your side, you're really in business. Don Rickles

Compared to what comics say today, I'm a monk, but in those days, it was unheard of to make fun of people like I did. Of course, they exaggerated how outrageous I really was. Don Rickles

Today People Say Those Exaggerated Outrageous Days Like Make Course How Comics Did Unheard Really Fun Compared Monk

I did a picture 40 years ago with Carroll O'Connor and Telly Savalas, God rest their souls, and Clint Eastwood, called 'Kelly's Heroes,' which we filmed in Yugoslavia for six months. Don Rickles

God Heroes Rest Picture Months Telly Eastwood Souls Years Clint Years Ago Clint Eastwood Did Six Which Yugoslavia Kelly

The inaugural of Ronald Reagan, with Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin. And that was the greatest thing. Ronald Reagan and George Bush. That was - I still remember like it was yesterday. Don Rickles

Remember Yesterday Frank Frank Sinatra Martin Sinatra Like Greatest Dean Reagan Dean Martin Still George George Bush Greatest Thing Ronald Reagan Bush Thing

Herb Solo at that time was the head of MGM. I said, 'I want to live like Clint Eastwood.' Did I know at that time Clint Eastwood, to him, Heaven was a truck, a dog, and a picnic basket for food or something? Don Rickles