Quotes by Comedians

So instead of talking about theoretical ways of ending the war and violence, I say that we have to get rid of the individual asholes in each office and situation. Colin Quinn
War Ending Situation Say Ways About Individual Instead Talking Office Get Theoretical Rid Each Violence
Everybody's funny in different ways. Colin Quinn
Funny Everybody Ways Different Different Ways
I'm quietly becoming New York's premiere actor. People don't understand. They have me pigeon-holed as a comedian. Colin Quinn
Me People New Comedian Pigeon-Holed Understand Becoming Quietly York Premiere Actor
I was a class clown. Colin Quinn
Class Clown Class Clown
People's - most people's job is talking about the future or like money not even in the present tense. It's not even paper. Colin Quinn
Future People Money Job Paper About Tense Like Most Talking Even Present Present Tense
Twitter is one of those dangerous toys that if it gets in the hands of the wrong person you'll have the mind of a 12-year-old masquerading as an adult. Colin Quinn
You Dangerous Mind Twitter Those Adult Wrong Masquerading Toys Person Hands Gets
I get the impression the English kings were witty, for some reason. I feel like all you had was your wit. Colin Quinn
You Some Kings Had Feel Like Wit Witty Were Impression Get Your Reason English
I think if you try to tailor your act to anybody, you end up with an act that doesn't work anyway. Colin Quinn
Work You Try Think Tailor End Up Anybody Anyway Act Your
I think everyone should own six guns, even though I don't own any. Colin Quinn
Own Think Everyone Though Guns Any Six Should Even
I've been to Japan, I've been to China, I've been to Africa, I've been to the Middle East, I've been to Europe a little bit. I've never been to South America. Colin Quinn
Bit East Never Been South South America America Africa Middle Middle East China Little Japan Little Bit Europe
The mistake that people make in stand-up is thinking they're profound or they're deep when there are so many people who have more worthwhile ways of phrasing things. Colin Quinn
Mistake People Thinking Ways Worthwhile More Make So Many People Who Deep Many Things Profound
I like guy stuff. Colin Quinn
Guy Stuff Like
If I had to give up everything else and keep just one aspect of the job, I'd have to keep writing because I love it. Yes, I enjoy performing, too. But I couldn't give up writing material. Colin Quinn
Love Writing Job Enjoy Too Else Everything Everything Else One Aspect Give Had Performing Because Material Up Yes Just Just One Aspect Keep
Stand-up is live, so I'm used to being live for most of my career. It's interesting. Colin Quinn
Live Most Being Interesting Used Career
For the most part, comedians are pretty friendly with each other. They always say they badmouth each other, but most of the time, they're friends. We're the only ones that can really stand our type of humor. Colin Quinn
Time Humor Other Type Our Say Pretty Only Part Most Comedians Always Friendly Friends Really Stand Each
A weird sort of awareness set in, like, 'Wow. My standup isn't just separate from everything else I do anymore.' With Twitter and Face book, everything is universal that everything everybody says gets seen. Colin Quinn
Book Face Seen Awareness Twitter Everybody Else Everything Everything Else Says Wow Weird Like Sort Gets Just Anymore Separate Standup Universal Set
That's the beauty of being a comedian - it's the one job you're allowed to do that. We're lucky. We're really lucky. Colin Quinn
You Job Beauty Allowed Comedian Being Really Lucky
Nobody knows what goes on behind the scenes with a YouTuber. Colleen Ballinger
Scenes Nobody Knows Goes Behind
My favorite movies were 'Singin' in the Rain' and stuff that had a more classic comedy type feel, that more slapsticky stuff. It's the comedy I've gravitated towards. Colleen Ballinger
Rain Comedy Type Favorite Favorite Movies Classic More Had Feel Towards Stuff Singin Were Movies
I definitely think we're living in a world or generation where we need constant gratification and adoration with Instagram and likes, and we base everything on attention. Colleen Ballinger
Generation World Living Think Everything Definitely Constant Adoration Instagram Attention Likes Where Base Gratification Need
I try my hardest with my live show and YouTube to make it appealing to all ages. Colleen Ballinger
Try Live YouTube Make Ages Show Appealing Hardest
I don't regret anything I've put out there. Colleen Ballinger
Regret Out Put Anything
I love and enjoy vocal performance, but I also have a huge passion for comedy and improv. Colleen Ballinger
Love Comedy Passion Enjoy Vocal Performance Also Huge Improv
It fascinated me, these kids who would sit in their living room or bedroom or kitchen and sing to the camera and act out the song fully as though they were onstage. Because a lot of musical theater kids... do that alone in your bedroom when you're a kid. But for someone to go and put that online? That's just so embarrassing! Colleen Ballinger
Alone Me You Song Sit Living Musical Kid Musical Theater Though Kids Embarrassing Out Would Someone Online Kitchen Onstage Put Sing Because Bedroom Go Were Camera Lot Just Theater Room Act Your Who Fascinated Fully Living Room
Anyone can sing badly, but to sing badly on purpose and make it believable is harder. I listen for the actual melody in my head but sing right underneath or above it out loud. It takes a lot of concentration. Colleen Ballinger
Melody Out Above Purpose Badly Head Takes Concentration Sing Make Underneath Lot Loud Listen Anyone Believable Actual Harder Right
Getting onstage and trying out all of my material and what works well with audiences and what doesn't, what works well in different atmospheres, has been the best training. Colleen Ballinger
Best Training Out Has-Been Onstage Well Material Audiences Been Trying Getting Different Works
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