Quotes by Comedians

I'm not high maintenance, and I'm not into a highly manicured man. I don't want to see a lot of hair product. Cecily Strong

Man Hair High High Maintenance See Highly Maintenance Lot Want Product

I got my degree in acting and theater, and then I had a teacher who told me to take a class with The Groundlings. And for a second, I thought, 'Well, I don't know about that. I'm a serious actress.' And then I did, and I loved it, and I said, 'Ah, well, I guess this is what I'm going to do now.' Cecily Strong

Teacher Me Class Thought Degree Guess About Take Had Know Well Said Got Did Going Loved Theater Then Acting Who Serious Now Actress Second

Extra-dirty vodka Martinis - they're so easy to drink! I should really just drink olive juice; it'd be safer. Cecily Strong

Easy Martini Vodka Drink Safer Juice Just Really Should Olive

I love so many cheeses. I like them hard and soft. I like cream cheese; I like cottage cheese... I'm a true Midwesterner. Cecily Strong

Love Cheese Cottage True Like Them Cream Hard Many Soft

I love to share food, especially if I made it or I'm particularly proud of what I ordered. Cecily Strong

Love Food Made Share Particularly Proud Ordered

If you're a nerd, just be a nerd. That's way better than a nerd who's trying to be a hipster. And if you are going to tell jokes, don't direct them at other people. Not only is it not funny, but it's also mean. Cecily Strong

Funny You Jokes People Better Just Be Other Way Tell Nerd Direct Only Also Than Trying Going Just Mean Them

I started doing professional theater and industrials in Chicago when I was a little squirt. Cecily Strong

Doing Chicago Theater Little Professional Started

I love New York, but I don't like how it smells like hot pee and garbage in the summer. I feel like Chicago isn't that way. Maybe I'm just being romantic. Cecily Strong

Love Garbage Summer Way Hot Feel New Like Smells How Chicago York Maybe Just New York Being Romantic

It is a big world that we live in, and people have a choice to love who they love. Cedric the Entertainer

Love People World Big Live To Love Choice Who

I've been blessed to have a long career. Cedric the Entertainer

Long Blessed Long Career Been Career

I want to be a little more dramatic nowadays. I definitely want something big and funny, but I look for things that can just have people see me in a different light and let me mature as both an entertainer and an actor and a comedian. Cedric the Entertainer

To me, you have to declare yourself a Chicano in order to be a Chicano. That makes a Chicano a Mexican-American with a defiant political attitude that centers on his or her right to self-definition. I'm a Chicano because I say I am. Cheech Marin

Attitude Me You Yourself Political Say Because Makes Am His Order Centers Declare Her Right

I was an altar boy and a choir member. Cheech Marin

Member Altar Boy Choir

I'm the go-to guy for Mexican priests. I'm the new Barry Fitzgerald, except with a Mexican accent. Cheech Marin

Guy Except Priests New Accent Mexican Fitzgerald Barry

Yeah, I'm the go-to guy for Mexican priests. Cheech Marin

Guy Priests Yeah Mexican

I love voice work. Cheech Marin

Work Love Voice

I grew up half in South Central and half in the San Fernando valley. Cheech Marin

Half Valley Fernando South Up Grew San Central

Well, sometimes you need the fields to lie fallow in order to gain nutrients. Cheech Marin

You Lie Sometimes Nutrients Well Fallow Order Gain Fields Need

Mexicans are quasi-legal. Cheech Marin

Mexicans