P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

P. J. O'Rourke
P. J. O'Rourke
American Comedian
Born: Nov 14, 1947
About American Government People Politics You
Fortunately, I'm married to someone who's a pretty excellent parent! P. J. O'Rourke
Married Pretty Someone Parent Excellent Fortunately
When I'm in the car, I want the only one shouting to be me. P. J. O'Rourke
Me Car Only Want Shouting
Fiscal conservatism is just an easy way to express something that is a bit more difficult, which is that the size and scope of government, and really the size and scope of politics in our lives, has grown uncomfortable, unwieldy, intrusive and inefficient. P. J. O'Rourke
Politics Government Difficult Conservatism Our Way Our Lives Bit Easy Easy Way Intrusive Something More Uncomfortable Inefficient Fiscal Scope Just Size Which Really Express Grown Lives
Everybody in America who didn't come over the Bering Strait ice bridge stole his land from somebody else. P. J. O'Rourke
Somebody Everybody Else Over Come His America Stole Ice Land Strait Who Bridge
Supposedly, summer vacation happens because that's when the kids are home from school, although having the kids home from school is no vacation. And supposedly the kids are home from school because of some vestigial throwback to our agricultural past. P. J. O'Rourke
Home School Past Our Summer Kids Some Having Throwback Supposedly Although Because Happens Agricultural Vacation
My working hypothesis is that stupidity in popular culture is a constant. Popular culture cannot get more stupid. P. J. O'Rourke
Culture Stupidity Stupid Constant More Hypothesis Get Cannot Working Popular Popular Culture
The 20th century was a test bed for big ideas - fascism, communism, the atomic bomb. P. J. O'Rourke
Communism Big Atomic Atomic Bomb Ideas 20th Century Bed Test Big Ideas Century Fascism Bomb
Global warming is a fact. Now it's up to liberals to make it a reality. Hence there is crucial importance in preventing powerful, greedy free market forces from getting in the way of worsening storms and rising sea levels. The Kyoto Accord is a good first step. P. J. O'Rourke
Good Reality Free First Greedy Market Liberals Market Forces Way Rising Preventing Free Market Fact Crucial Step Powerful Global Importance Global Warming Make Forces First Step Accord Up Getting Storms Warming Sea Hence Now Levels
Death is so important that God visited death upon his own son, thereby helping us learn right from wrong well enough that we may escape death forever and live eternally in God's grace. P. J. O'Rourke
Death God Son Grace Important Own Live Enough Visited Wrong Well Well Enough Learn His Escape Forever May Eternally Us Helping Thereby Right
Barack Obama is more irritating than the other nuisances on the Left. P. J. O'Rourke
Other Obama More Left Than Irritating Barack Barack Obama
People think the free market is a philosophy, they think that it is a creed. It is none of those things. Free market is a bathroom scale, it is a measuring tape, it's simply a measurement. P. J. O'Rourke
People Measurement Free Think Market Bathroom Philosophy Those Scale Free Market Simply None Tape Measuring Things Creed
Of course, no one wants to ban the vote. Voting should remain available for sporting and recreational purposes. But certain types of votes clearly should be curtailed - 'assault votes,' for example, in which the only purpose of the vote is to harm others. P. J. O'Rourke
Vote Voting Example Others Types Only Purpose Remain Purposes Recreational No-One Clearly Votes For Example Course Ban Wants Which Available Certain Should Assault Harm
The budget doesn't have much control over the government. Then again, the government doesn't have much control over the budget. P. J. O'Rourke
Government Control Over Budget Again Then Much
Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper. P. J. O'Rourke
Love Family Love Is Bad Like Annoying Messy Clinging Repetitive Wallpaper Pattern
I've never been able to get it straight about what these people who are worried about the trade deficit are worried about. P. J. O'Rourke
People Worried Deficit Able About Never Trade Trade Deficit Been Get Straight Who
A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat. P. J. O'Rourke
Life You Rest Stupid Nothing Hat More Taken Looks Off Left Than Greet Lady Should Your
The foundation of collectivism is simple: There should be no important economic differences among people. No one should be too rich. P. J. O'Rourke
People Simple Important Differences Rich Too Collectivism Economic No-One Should Foundation Among
Abstract anger is great for rhetorical carrying on. You can go on endlessly about the post office, but it doesn't mean you're mad at your mailman. P. J. O'Rourke
Great You Anger Post Mad Post Office Carrying About Abstract Go Office Endlessly Rhetorical Mean Your
Like it or not, I've come to appreciate soccer. Any kid can play, which fits with the inclusive agenda of progressive schools. Although the corollary to 'any kid can play' is that every kid must play because there is an iron grip to the warm hug of progressive inclusionism. P. J. O'Rourke
Hug Inclusive Every Progressive Corollary Kid Must Come Like Schools Although Because Fits Iron Any Which Soccer Warm Grip Agenda Play Appreciate
A Kindle returns us to the inconvenience of the scroll, except with batteries and electronic glitches. It's as handy as bringing Homer along to recite the 'Iliad' while playing a lyre. P. J. O'Rourke
Recite Batteries Kindle Except Along Returns Handy While Scroll Us Iliad Electronic Homer Bringing Inconvenience Playing
Jimmy Carter was - he still - he remains to this day America's most ex of ex-presidents. You just can't believe that we elected this doofus. He was a bright enough guy and sort of well-meaning. But he was about as prepared to be president of the United States as your goofy old uncle, you know, the one that memorises baseball statistics. P. J. O'Rourke
Day You Old Uncle Believe Enough President Jimmy Jimmy Carter States Statistics Carter About Guy Remains He Know Most Goofy Sort Well-Meaning Still America Just Elected Your Prepared Baseball Bright United United States
Government is a health hazard. Governments have killed many more people than cigarettes or unbuckled seat belts ever have. P. J. O'Rourke
Government Health People Cigarettes More More People Hazard Governments Than Many Ever Seat Belts
Computers seem a little too adaptively flexible, like the strange natives, odd societies, and head cases we study in the social sciences. There's more opposable thumb in the digital world than I care for; it's awfully close to human. P. J. O'Rourke
Strange World Care Digital Too Digital World I Care Seem Cases More Computers Thumb Head Study Like Sciences Odd Close Than Human Natives Little Social Flexible Social Sciences Societies
The two most frightening words in Washington are 'bipartisan consensus.' Bipartisan consensus is when my doctor and my lawyer agree with my wife that I need help. P. J. O'Rourke
Doctor Words Wife Lawyer Most Frightening Help Agree Washington Consensus Two Need Bipartisan
Raining on parades requires no skill or effort on the part of a politician. P. J. O'Rourke
Politician Parades Part Effort Skill Requires Raining
There's something about Marxism that brings out warts; the only kind of growth this economic system encourages. P. J. O'Rourke
System Out Kind About Something Only Economic Marxism Economic System Encourages Warts Growth Brings
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