Quotes by Comedians

Women are hilarious. Erik Griffin

Women Hilarious Women Are

When they first start doing comedy, new comics or even people that have only been doing it three or four years, they're doing an impersonation of a stand-up. This is what I think a stand-up should sound like. Erik Griffin

People Comedy Three First Think Only New Like Sound Comics Doing Been Years Should Even Four Start

It's not like every male comic you meet is funny. Like, a lot of them are not funny. Erik Griffin

Funny You Every Meet Like Comic Male Lot Them

I started going to the open mics every day in 2003. You make the comics laugh, they get you work, and you build up your reputation. It was a slow process. Erik Griffin

Work Day You Every Day Slow Build Reputation Every Laugh Slow Process Open Make Comics Up Get Going Process Your Started

I was born and raised in Los Angeles. Erik Griffin

Born Angeles Los Los Angeles Raised

'Workaholics' seems like it's doing wonders for my career. Erik Griffin

Seems Like Doing Wonders Career

People don't realize it's not just about being funny, and they don't know how perceptive a comedian needs to be about human nature. You have to really be able to read a situation and peoples' emotions. Erik Griffin

Television: A medium. So called because it's neither rare nor well done. Ernie Kovacs

Rare Medium Television Neither Well Well Done Because Nor Done So-Called

I met my wife, Doreen, who was a dancer in the show. Ernie Wise

Wife Met Dancer Show Who

Things really began to move for us. In 1953 I could afford to marry Doreen. Ernie Wise

Marry Could Began Afford Move Us Really Things

To create a comedy major, I ended up starting a comedy night in the basement of my dorm, and I promoted and produced my final project, which meant I faxed press releases from an old Apple IIC, or whatever it was, to newspapers, not knowing if that would work or if that's how you do things. Eugene Mirman

Work You Comedy Old Whatever Not Knowing Final Project Press Release Would Promoted Major Knowing How Up Ended Which Dorm Newspapers Create Produced Meant Basement Apple Things Night Starting

Yes, I'm known as America's most genuine comedian. Eugene Mirman

Comedian Most Known Genuine Yes America

I went to high school in Lexington, Massachusetts, which in hindsight was very nice. Eugene Mirman

School Nice High High School Massachusetts Hindsight Very Which Lexington

Jews don't care about ancient rivalries. We worry about humidity in Miami. Evan Sayet

Care Jews Worry Ancient About Rivalries Miami dont Care Humidity

Being a funny person does an awful lot of things to you. You feel that you mustn't get serious with people. They don't expect it from you, and they don't want to see it. You're not entitled to be serious, you're a clown. Fanny Brice

Funny You People Entitled Clown Funny Person See Feel Does Lot Expect Person Get Being Want Serious Awful Awful Lot Things

Wrong is for other people. Fanny Brice

People Other Wrong

I don't weigh a pound over one hundred and eighty and, what's more, I never did. Fatty Arbuckle

Hundred More Pound Weigh Never Over Did Eighty

The secret of my success with Geraldine is that she's not a putdown of women. She's smart, she's trustful, she's loyal, she's sassy. Flip Wilson

Success Women Smart Secret She The Secret Of Loyal Sassy