9553 quotes by comedians for you to enjoy

It's that stubborn fixation on details that has invariably prevented me from getting excited about celebrating each passing year. Which is why my friends know that doing things such as throwing me surprise parties would only serve to surprise me with an overwhelming sense of panic and anxiety. Dan Levy

Me Anxiety Year Overwhelming Sense Panic Would Details About Invariably Only Stubborn Throwing Excited Know Parties Passing Doing Surprise Friends Celebrating Getting Which Each Why Serve Things

It's pretty incredible to think that someone who once dreamed of a life in fashion could go from reading 'Vogue' during recess in elementary school to eventually seeing his designs grace those very pages. Dan Levy

Life Fashion Grace School Reading Think Incredible Once Those Dreamed Seeing Pretty Someone Vogue Could Go His Very Pages Who Elementary Elementary School Eventually Designs Recess

I like to refer to my small social circle as 'boutique.' And much like the hotels of the same ilk, my friends are all unique, high quality, and serve me good food. But more than that, they teach me things about the world and about myself that I couldn't learn anywhere else. Dan Levy

Myself Good Food Me Quality World Circle Else High About More Small High-Quality Hotels Like Learn Refer Friends Than Same Anywhere Anywhere Else Social Much Teach Unique Serve Good Food Things

Lauryn Hill quietly released 'Lose Myself' as part of the 'Surf's Up' motion picture soundtrack - shocking, I know. It's not only one of the best summer tracks you'll add to your catalogue: it's also one of the most honest and heartfelt songs she's has ever written. Dan Levy

Best Myself You Picture Lose Add Summer Released Lauryn Hill Only Songs Catalogue Part Written Know Most Hill Also She Tracks Surf Motion Motion Picture Soundtrack Up Shocking Heartfelt Quietly Your Ever Honest

I remember quite clearly a time when I knew exactly what I wanted to do with my life. I was six, I was worry-free, and I aspired to be an actor-slash-pizza maker. To me, the decision was simple; that is what would make me happy. Dan Levy

Life Time Me Happy Simple Remember Decision My Life Would Exactly Exactly What Knew Clearly Make Maker Quite Six Wanted Aspired

I had always been scared of the unknown, and I think it had a lot to do with a lack of self-confidence (and wearing thick, dark-rimmed glasses before they were considered cool). Dan Levy

Glasses Before Think Unknown Considered Scared Wearing Had Self-Confidence Always Were Been Lot Lack Cool Thick

There was a time in my life when people called me 'Denim Dan.' I didn't like it. And fortunately for my self-esteem, it didn't stick for very long. I was 12, and I was given the name by my classmates after I showed up to the first day of school in - wait for it - triple denim. Dan Levy

Following a trend too closely is a risky thing. If not properly executed, you could easily end up looking uncomfortable, over-styled, and downright foolish. Dan Levy

You Trend Looking Too Easily Following Properly Risky Could Uncomfortable Foolish Executed End Up Closely Downright Thing

'Simply the Best' has always been one of my favourite songs and a song that I've always thought was far deeper than what you imagine it to be at first listen. I found the lyrics to be really, oddly beautiful, considering you rarely stop and think about them. Dan Levy

Beautiful Best You Song Thought First Think Lyrics Considering Favourite Rarely About Songs Simply Always Been Oddly Than Listen Stop Them Far Really Found Deeper Imagine

When I was working at MTV, people would e-mail me asking where I bought my frames, and I always felt a little uneasy telling a teenager to go out and pick up a $400 pair of glasses. Dan Levy

What skills I lacked in, say, math or science, I like to think I made up for in my ability to read people and situations with great clarity. I therefore considered myself as a sort of valued soothsayer when it came to dispensing opinions to my friends about their life choices or relationships. Dan Levy

Life Myself Great Science People Made Think Relationships Considered Say Valued Clarity Ability About Like Read Sort Opinions Came Math Up Friends Situations Choices Skills Therefore

There is something transformative about the act of finding your own way without a to-do list. Dan Levy

Own Way Finding About Something Without List Transformative Act Your

When I feel like treating myself, I'll either turn to food or clothes. Bad food. Expensive clothes. Ironically, I'm usually rewarding myself for a solid week of healthy eating or a nice paycheque. Dan Levy

Myself Food Healthy Clothes Nice Solid Bad Eating Week Feel Like Ironically Rewarding Expensive Expensive Clothes Either Turn Treating

Sometimes circumstance blinds us at first from seeing people for who they really are. Dan Levy

People Sometimes First Circumstance Seeing Blinds Us Really Who

To edit someone from your life must be a properly evaluated decision. After all, the act of distancing yourself is difficult and, if executed improperly, could prove even more troublesome than if you were to have done nothing at all. The key is to create the distance gradually - a 'fade out' as I like to call it. Dan Levy

Life You Yourself Key Decision Nothing Difficult Distance Out Must Someone Properly More Could Troublesome Fade Like Executed Call Edit Prove Were Than Gradually Done After Create Act Your Even

There is a lot men don't know about women. And I'm not just talking about how you manage to leave the bathroom smelling like a tropical rainforest after you shower or how you're able to walk in shoes that rely on nothing more than the support of two five-inch toothpicks. Dan Levy

You Women Walk Men Shoes Nothing Bathroom Able About More Rely Tropical Support Like Know Smelling Talking How Leave Lot Than Manage Just After Shower Two