37 Michael McIntyre Quotes for You to Enjoy

Michael McIntyre

English Comedian

Born: Feb 21, 1976

Comedy Like Me People Wife You

There's nothing better than having a bright, blinding light in your face and being guided by big, rolling laughter. There's nothing more encouraging than hearing that huge sound. I've waited my whole life to hear that. You come away with the biggest high of your life. Michael McIntyre

Life You Better Light Laughter Face Big Nothing Guided High Having More Come Blinding Sound Hear Waited Hearing Encouraging Huge Than Rolling Being Biggest Your Whole Bright Away

I had a great moment with Michael Buble where I asked him if he could teach me to sing like him and he said why we don't sing together, so we did! It was great because my wife and children came to watch his performance. Michael McIntyre

Great Me Together Wife Could Had He Performance Like Sing Him Because Said Came His Michael Did Where Children Asked Teach Moment Why Watch

I was trying to do one-liners and it took me years to realise I just had to be myself. My fear was if I was myself and no one found it funny, I'd have nowhere left to go. Michael McIntyre

Funny Myself Me Fear Took One-Liners Had No-One Go Years Left Trying Just Realise Found Nowhere

I go to the British Comedy Awards and, you know, quite a few people were making jokes at my expense. It just made me feel awful, because I am there with my wife and she has gone out and bought a dress. And it is my big night and I won, and yet the overriding experience was that of nastiness. Michael McIntyre

Me You Jokes Experience People I Am Comedy Wife Made Big Few Gone Out Dress Bought Feel Know She Because Making Am Go Were Overriding Won Few People Quite Expense Just Awards Awful Night British

Hard audiences tend to be when it's all men. It's when businesses have dos where they're at conferences all day then book a comedian for the evening. They're men of a certain age - basically middle-aged, balding, 50 to 60 years old and I just know I can't make these people laugh hysterically. Michael McIntyre

Day Age Book People Old Men All Day Laugh Tend Comedian Know Make Audiences Years Conferences Just Where Middle-Aged Then Certain Certain Age Hard Businesses Evening Basically

It's hard to see your dad once in a blue moon. Michael McIntyre

Moon Once See Blue Your Hard Dad

I've always felt so unconnected to other comedians. Michael McIntyre

Other Comedians Felt Always

I definitely wanted a Ferrari 328 - I was obsessive about cars as a kid. Michael McIntyre

Car Kid Definitely About Obsessive Ferrari Wanted

I don't understand people who write blogs and have children. You can't stop in the middle of bathtime and say: ‘I'm just going to write a load of words - for free.' I won't do it - unless someone wants to commission me. Michael McIntyre

I usually do quite well with presents, but the problem with Christmas is it's such a big build-up and such a big day that if someone tests you the year after, you've got no idea what you got. Michael McIntyre

Christmas Day You Problem Big Year No Idea Someone Idea Well Build-Up Got Tests Quite The Problem With After Presents

If I'm honest, I think everything is funny. You've just got to find the right way in. When I'm at my happiest and when I'm really on it, when I feel like I'm really on good form at the moment, everything can be funny. Michael McIntyre

I always used to want everyone to like me, because it used to hurt so much when people made snidey comments or gave me bad reviews, but I've learnt to deal with it. Michael McIntyre

Me Hurt People Made Gave Everyone Bad Like Because Deal Always Learnt Reviews Comments Want Much Used

I've got some Jewish ancestry and I don't like waste. Michael McIntyre

Ancestry Some Like Got Waste Jewish

The people who don't like me are completely irrelevant to me, just as I'm irrelevant to them. Michael McIntyre

Me People Like Irrelevant Just Them Who

I never felt like I belong to anything - to any groups of friends. I never really had that. Michael McIntyre

Never Had Like Felt Friends Any Anything Really Groups Belong

I don't like upsetting people. Michael McIntyre

People Like Upsetting

The world is in a bit of a state. I don't know how it's happened so quickly but everyone's a bit on edge. I'm not sure that our leaders are doing a great job globally. We're hoping on Trump and Kim Jong-un - these two people who maybe aren't necessarily the sanest. Michael McIntyre

Great People World Job Edge State Everyone Our Bit Kim Great Job Hoping Leaders Know Globally Sure How Doing Trump Quickly Maybe Happened Who Necessarily Two Two People

Given this voice, I know it does sound like I've come from money. But my dad was Canadian and my mum Hungarian, so it's not like I have some high-society, upper-class English background. Michael McIntyre

Money Background Hungarian Some Given Voice Come Like Know Does Sound Canadian Upper-Class English Dad Mum