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Jeanne Marie Laskas Quotes
Jeanne Marie Laskas Quotes
Jeanne Marie Laskas
American
Writer
About
First
Life
Made
People
You
Related authors:
Dale Carnegie
Denis Waitley
Dr. Seuss
H. L. Mencken
Napoleon Hill
Ray Bradbury
W. E. B. Du Bois
William Arthur Ward
Bob Dole. He's like the neighbors' Labrador retriever your dad used to curse for all that barking, all that darn digging in your mom's tulip bed, and now look, you live next door to a godforsaken pack of teeth-baring rabid Pomeranians, and, good golly, Bob Dole!
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Good
Mom
You
Live
Digging
Neighbors
Darn
He
Like
Look
Bed
Dole
Tulip
Curse
Door
Pack
Rabid
Bob
Next
Next Door
Your
Used
Barking
Dad
Now
Seagulls are a landfill nuisance because they fly away with food scraps and, as is their reputation, fight each other over them midflight, often losing them, and soon a lady has a half-eaten hamburger splashing into her backyard pool.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Food
Fight
Losing
Fly
Pool
Reputation
Other
Backyard
Soon
Over
Because
Hamburger
Scraps
Often
Lady
Them
Landfill
Seagull
Each
Away
Her
Nuisance
Getting Richard Norris his new face wasn't easy. For starters, doctors needed a donor who wasn't just a favorable blood match but also had the proper skeletal features and skin color - they calculated only a 14 percent chance they'd find one. Then there was the epic surgery that took a team of 150 people.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
People
Face
Doctors
Skin
Took
Favorable
Easy
Find
Percent
Proper
Only
Features
Color
Had
New
Calculated
Also
Match
Surgery
His
Blood
Getting
Donor
Just
Epic
Richard
Then
Skin Color
Team
Who
Starters
Chance
Needed
In the early 16th century the Italian physician Jacopo Berengario da Carpi, a pioneer in the science of anatomy, came up with the idea that perhaps 'brain commotion' was caused by the thrust of the soft structure of the brain against the solid case of the skull.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Science
Physician
Anatomy
Solid
Case
Structure
Thrust
Idea
Perhaps
Came
Caused
Italian
Brain
Up
Pioneer
Against
Century
Skull
Early
Soft
When people spot Fallon in public, they do not shriek or drool or go wobbly in the knees. It's a different look entirely. A tilt of the head, mouth agape, eyebrows rolled like you do when you see a puppy.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
You
People
Mouth
Eyebrows
Puppy
See
Entirely
Knees
Head
Drool
Like
Look
Spot
Tilt
Wobbly
Go
Different
Public
The last time Congress seriously addressed the notion of creating a way to keep track of America's guns was 1968.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Time
Seriously
Congress
Way
Guns
Track
America
Creating
Notion
Keep
Last
Last Time
The 'modern' air-traffic-control system, and the FAA itself, was created in the aftermath of one of the most dramatic commercial midair bashes, way back in 1956.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Dramatic
Back
Way
System
Most
Itself
Commercial
Modern
Aftermath
Created
The brain is suspended in a kind of thick jelly inside the skull, and a helmet can't keep it from sloshing around. If you hit your head hard enough, the brain goes bashing against the walls of the skull.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
You
Walls
Enough
Kind
Inside
Head
Around
Brain
Hit
Goes
Suspended
Against
Your
Hard
Helmet
Skull
Jelly
Keep
Thick
Every vice president since Mondale has lived up on this hill, on the twelve-acre campus of the Naval Observatory in Northwest Washington. It's a pretty house with a wraparound porch and a white turret.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
White
Every
President
Pretty
Observatory
Since
Hill
House
Up
Campus
Northwest
Vice
Vice President
Naval
Washington
Lived
Porch
Fallon tells me about first starting 'Late Night': how he knew audiences were dubious.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Me
First
Late
Late-Night
Tells
About
He
Knew
Dubious
How
Audiences
Were
Night
Starting
Almost as soon as it aired, 'Late Night' became one of the most buzzed-about shows on television.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Late
Late-Night
Television
Almost
Soon
Most
Became
Shows
Night
In the Dobbsian view of America, the mainstream media isn't evil because it's liberal but because it's lazy. And Washington is utterly corrupt, has sold out, Democrats and Republicans alike. And corporate America is an insatiable pig.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Evil
Liberal
Corporate
Sold
Corporate America
Alike
Insatiable
Out
Corrupt
Lazy
Mainstream
Mainstream Media
Pig
Because
Democrats
Democrats And Republicans
America
Republicans
View
Washington
Media
Utterly
You can't think 'Dole' without thinking 'Bob Dole' and cartoons and third-person good times. He was one of those politicians: the kind you jabbed but were happy enough to have around.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Good
You
Happy
Politicians
Think
Thinking
Enough
Those
Kind
Cartoons
Good Times
He
Around
Without
Dole
Were
Times
Bob
Bob Dole is not a romantic, at least not an immediate one. Bob Dole is not one to waste a lot of time on metaphor.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Time
Immediate
Metaphor
Least
Dole
Lot
Romantic
Bob
Waste
In the summer of 2007, Roger Goodell, the new NFL commissioner, convened a meeting in Chicago for the first league-wide concussion summit. All thirty-two teams were ordered to send doctors and trainers to the meeting.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
First
Doctors
Meeting
Summer
Summit
New
Were
Chicago
Roger
Trainers
Commissioner
Send
Ordered
Teams
Dead at 50. Mike Webster! Nine-time Pro Bowler. Hall of Famer. 'Iron Mike,' legendary Steelers center for fifteen seasons.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Webster
Dead
Bowler
Hall
Iron
Pro
Legendary
Center
Fifteen
Mike
Seasons
Ndamukong started out playing soccer, like his sister before him. She excelled at it, played for Mississippi State, made the Cameroon national team.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Made
National
Before
Sister
State
Out
Excelled
Like
Mississippi
She
Him
His
Cameroon
National Team
Soccer
Team
Played
Started
Playing
'The melancholy of all things done' is the way Buzz once described his complete mental breakdown after returning from the moon. Booze. A couple of divorces. A psych ward. Broke. At one point he was selling cars.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Car
Moon
Complete
Once
Melancholy
Way
Broke
Booze
All Things
Mental
Point
He
Divorces
Couple
Returning
His
Selling
Done
After
Breakdown
Ward
Things
Buzz
By 2012, Dan Gilbert was well over his LeBron James-abandonment hissy fit. He opened Cleveland's first casino, with 1,900 slot machines and eighty-nine table games.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Casino
First
Dan
Machines
Gilbert
Slot
Table
He
Opened
Over
Cleveland
Well
LeBron
His
Fit
Games
The LeBron 11, for $200, has hyperposite construction - a combination of Foamposite material and performance synthetics - and a new layer of Lunarlon cushioning; and anyway, Nike generates about $300 million off the sneakers.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Construction
Nike
About
Layer
Performance
Combination
New
Material
LeBron
Off
Sneakers
Anyway
Million
Pearl Harbor? Michael Bay doing a movie about the single most devastating, most holy day in United States military history? Why, that's like the Three Stooges doing a Holocaust movie. Or Barney doing 'Hamlet'.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Day
History
Three
Single
Military
States
Bay
About
Devastating
Like
Most
Doing
Hamlet
Michael
Stooges
Movie
Holocaust
Holy
Harbor
Barney
United
Why
United States
United States Military
Pearl
Pearl Harbor
There's no telling how many guns we have in America - and when one gets used in a crime, no way for the cops to connect it to its owner. The only place the police can turn for help is a Kafkaesque agency in West Virginia, where, thanks to the gun lobby, computers are illegal and detective work is absurdly antiquated.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Work
Police
Crime
Gun
Thanks
Virginia
Lobby
Way
Telling
Detective
Guns
Only
Computers
Absurdly
How
West
West Virginia
Antiquated
America
Gets
Owner
Where
Place
Turn
Agency
Used
Help
Illegal
Connect
Many
Cops
Jim Udinski has been coaching in the league for the past fourteen years, and his Division II team, the Lenape Valley Indians from suburban Philadelphia, has already made history - twice.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
History
Made
Past
Jim
Valley
Has-Been
Indians
Division
League
Been
His
Years
Suburban
Coaching
Team
Twice
Fourteen
Philadelphia
Contrary to popular mythology, not all NFL cheerleaders are bimbos or strippers or bored pretty girls looking to get rich. The Ben-Gals offer proof. Neither a bimbo nor a stripper nor a bored pretty girl would survive the rigorous life of a Ben-Gal. The Ben-Gals all have jobs or school or both.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Life
School
Girl
Pretty Girl
Looking
Rich
Jobs
Neither
Rigorous
Would
Bored
Pretty
Proof
Pretty Girls
Both
Mythology
Cheerleaders
Nor
Contrary
Offer
Survive
Get
Popular
Bimbo
People assume NFL cheerleaders are within some vague sniffing distance of the good life, but a Ben-Gal is paid seventy-five bucks per game. That is correct: seventy-five bucks for each of ten home games. The grand cash total per season does not keep most of them flush in hair spray, let alone gas money to and from practice.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
Life
Alone
Good
Home
Game
People
Money
Hair
Practice
Assume
Good Life
Distance
Flush
Correct
Total
Some
Per
Cash
Ten
Bucks
Most
Cheerleaders
Within
Does
Spray
Grand
Them
Paid
Games
Each
Keep
Season
Gas
Vague
People assume cheering in the NFL is mostly about a girl trying to snag herself a big, beefy, stinkin' rich football player. That is not the case.
Jeanne Marie Laskas
People
Girl
Big
Rich
Assume
Herself
About
Case
Football
Football Player
Cheering
Mostly
Trying
Player
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