Chris Gethard Quotes

Chris Gethard
Chris Gethard
American Actor
Born: May 23, 1980
Because Life Me People Think You
Related authors: Bruce Lee Clint Eastwood Kevin Hart Mr. T Orson Welles Shia LaBeouf Tom Hanks Will Rogers
In 2002, I was taking an improv class because, as a white male with glasses who was born between 1978 and 1994, it's legally required that I take at least one improv class in my life. Chris Gethard
Life Class Glasses My Life White At Least One Born Take Taking Between Because Least Male Improv Legally Required Who
When people ask me, 'Why don't you drink?' I usually smile and say 'Because I'm not good at it.' Chris Gethard
Smile Good Me You People Say Drink Because Ask Why
West Orange, where I grew up, is the hometown of Ian Ziering from 'Beverly Hills, 90210,' Scott Wolf from 'Party of Five,' David Cassidy from the 'Partridge Family,' and Mike Pitt of 'Boardwalk Empire' and 'Dawson's Creek.' Chris Gethard
Family Party Wolf David Dawson Beverly Empire Beverly Hills Hills West Up Five Scott Orange Where Pitt Grew Boardwalk Mike Hometown Creek
I take medications every morning and night - they're my breakfast, and they're my dessert. I love them. Chris Gethard
Love Morning Breakfast Every Dessert Take Them Medications Night
Maria Bamford is someone who's really inspired me in a big way. Chris Gethard
Me Big Way Someone Inspired Big Way Really Maria
Cops are everywhere in New York City. Cars drive by every few minutes. Uniforms stand nonchalantly at street corners. Chris Gethard
Car Drive Few Every Corners Everywhere City Minutes New York New York New York City Uniforms Stand Street Cops
There are certain fundamental things that scream, 'I just moved to New York.' Things like eating cheesecake at Junior's or heading out to Coney Island to ride the Cyclone. Chris Gethard
Ride Out Eating Heading New Like Cheesecake Island Junior York Just Scream Moved New York Certain Fundamental Things
As a largely unsuccessful comedian, I've become someone that younger people sometimes find and ask for advice, which I'm happy to give, even though it makes me feel old. Chris Gethard
Me Happy People Sometimes Old Advice Become Though Find Someone Give Feel Unsuccessful Comedian Makes Which Younger Ask Younger People Even Largely
My medications make me easier to deal with. They don't interfere with my creativity or turn me into a zombie or dull my real personality. They help me connect with people, allow me to stay calm when situations seem overwhelming, and help keep my thoughts from racing out of control. They help me leave the house when I'm scared to. They help. Chris Gethard
Me Thoughts Creativity People Personality Calm Overwhelming Control Easier Out Stay Stay Calm Scared Seem Allow House Make Deal Real Leave Dull Situations Turn Racing Interfere Help Connect Keep Zombie Medications
I grew up a loser, and I always felt like one, but I turned out pretty okay. I may be living proof that you can spend your whole life feeling like you're falling down a set of steps and still maybe land on your feet at the bottom. Chris Gethard
Life You Feeling Down Living Spend Okay Out Pretty Proof Bottom Steps Feet Like Felt Always Still Loser Falling Up May Maybe Grew Land Turned Your Whole Living Proof Set
I think so often about how, when I was starting out at UCB, Conan O'Brien was in town, and on his show back then, they sometimes did character bits, and I started getting paid to dress up as a page or a Dutch boy on his show. Chris Gethard
Character Sometimes Think Back Bits Out Dress Dress-Up About Conan Town Boy How His Up Did Getting Dutch Often Then Page Paid Show Started Starting
I remember the people who mentored me, and I just love being able to do that for other people. Chris Gethard
Love Me People Remember Other Able Just Being Who
Cops in New York City don't have the best reputation. It's a fast-paced city, and they deal with a lot, and many people have seen lots of cops interact with the public utilizing what can be gently called 'not the best customer service.' Chris Gethard
Service Best People Seen Reputation City New Deal Gently Lot Lots York New York Interact New York City Public Customer Customer Service Many Utilizing Fast-Paced Cops
Anyone who's ever been around an emergency in Manhattan realizes that there are plainclothes officers on these streets walking past us more than we ever realize. Chris Gethard
Past Emergency More Around Been Walking Than Officers Manhattan Anyone Realize Us Ever Streets
Anyone who lives in N.Y.C. will tell you that getting into a confrontation on a city street is a complete nightmare 100 percent of the time. Chris Gethard
Time You Will Complete Tell City Percent Getting Anyone Confrontation Who Lives Street Nightmare
I classify myself as a comedian, but I'm one of those comedians who also acts so that I can split the difference and feel insecure about both. Chris Gethard
Myself Those Insecure About Classify Both Split Feel Comedian Comedians Also Difference Who Acts
I don't think I'm ugly per se, but on bad days, I have been told that I look like the monster from 'The Hills Have Eyes.' That was extremely confidence-shattering, so I try to take care of myself. Chris Gethard
Myself Eyes Ugly Try Care Think Monster Extremely Bad Bad Days Per Take Take Care Days Like Look Hills Been
If you are dating someone in New York City, and they invite you over to watch a movie, they don't really want to watch a movie. Chris Gethard
You City Someone Dating Invite Over New York New York New York City Want Movie Really Watch
No one in New York hangs out in their apartments. Chris Gethard
Out No-One New York New York Apartments
By August of 2003, I had graduated from Rutgers, gone through a stretch of living at my parents' house, and wound up sharing an apartment with a college friend of mine in Montclair, New Jersey. Chris Gethard
College Parents Gone Living Mine Wound Through Had Sharing New House New Jersey August Friend Up Graduated Apartment Jersey Stretch
In late 2004, I left my much-maligned home state of New Jersey for the supposedly greener pastures of Astoria, Queens. I'd finally be in the mix, living off the subway line, able to go from audition to audition during the day and from late night show to late night show in the wee hours of the morning. Chris Gethard
Day Home Morning Living Late State Late-Night Finally Able Wee New Supposedly Hours New Jersey Audition Go Line Mix Queens Off Left Greener Subway Show Home State Jersey Night
Bedbugs have never been cool, and bedbugs will never be cool. Chris Gethard
Will Never Been Cool
I had bedbugs in 2005. I felt like a leper. Worse than a leper. At least lepers had a colony they could go and live in with other people who empathized. I instead had friends stand up from tables and walk out of restaurants when I told them I had bedbugs, because they were afraid I'd transfer the bugs to them. Chris Gethard
People Walk Live Other Worse Out Restaurants Tables Colony Could Had Instead Like Bugs Because Felt Least Go Were Up Friends Than Afraid Transfer Them Leper Stand Stand Up Who
The bad you see in N.Y.C. is troubling to know when it rears its ugly head. Chris Gethard
You Ugly Bad See Troubling Head Know
When my TV show was in production, dozens of women asked me out on Facebook. Some were shy about it; some were blatant. Some I knew, some were total strangers. But they went for it. Chris Gethard
Me Facebook Women Strangers Out TV TV Show Total Some About Blatant Knew Were Asked Production Show Dozens Shy
No aspect of my brief and mild fame actually made me happier. Chris Gethard
Me Made Fame Happier Aspect Mild Brief Actually
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