Quotesia
Home
Authors
Popular authors
George Bernard Shaw
H. G. Wells
Nathaniel Hawthorne
Christian Nestell Bovee
George Will
Margaret Mead
All authors
Today's birthdays
1955 - John Roberts
1756 - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
1945 - Clarissa Pinkola Estes
1832 - Lewis Carroll
1850 - Samuel Gompers
1942 - James Cromwell
Today's birthdays
Popular professions
Inventor
Businessman
Saint
Author
Celebrity
President
All professions
Authors by letter
A
B
C
D
E
F
G
H
I
J
K
L
M
N
O
P
Q
R
S
T
U
V
W
X
Y
Z
All authors
Topics
Top Quotes
Quotesia
Favorite Authors
Garry Shandling Quotes
Garry Shandling Quotes
Garry Shandling
American
Comedian
Born:
Nov 29
,
1949
Died:
Mar 24
,
2016
First
Funny
Love
Me
Think
You
Related authors:
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
Milton Berle
Mitch Hedberg
Robin Williams
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
W. C. Fields
Nice guys finish first. If you don't know that, then you don't know where the finish line is.
Garry Shandling
You
Finish Line
First
Nice
Finish
Guys
Know
Line
Where
Then
Nice Guys
My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me.
Garry Shandling
Me
Problem
Intimacy
Tell
Know
Friends
Really
I don't think I'm severely politically active. I care deeply, and I have my strong personal beliefs. I think America is dancing on thin ice. But I think it's bigger even than a political issue. I wonder about the evolution of the human race and spirit and what our goals and reasons for living are.
Garry Shandling
Strong
Political
Goals
Care
Active
Living
Think
Our
Dancing
Evolution
Spirit
About
Issue
Wonder
Than
America
Personal
Politically
Human
Bigger
Ice
Race
Reasons
Human Race
Even
Beliefs
Thin
Deeply
I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead.
Garry Shandling
Love
Made
Once
Minutes
Hour
Clocks
Fifteen
Fifteen Minutes
Night
Set
But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone.
Garry Shandling
Love
Funny
Strength
Me
Improvise
Think
Interviewing
Mine
Someone
Hosting
Like
Spontaneity
Behind
Really
Desk
You know it's funny that none of the regular late-night shows now use guest hosts the way Johnny did. No one talks about it much, but it's curious that they don't do it. They would each have to be asked the reason why they don't.
Garry Shandling
Funny
You
Late-Night
Guest
Way
Would
About
Johnny
No-One
Hosts
Know
Talks
None
Curious
Did
Asked
Much
Regular
Use
Reason
Shows
Each
Now
Why
I am pretty tenacious as a perfectionist in terms of getting something right.
Garry Shandling
Pretty
Something
Tenacious
Perfectionist
Terms
Am
Getting
Right
I play basketball on Sundays and I'm a very spiritual guy; I read a lot of Eastern philosophy and I meditate.
Garry Shandling
Spiritual
Philosophy
Sundays
Eastern
Guy
Read
Lot
Very
Play
Play Basketball
Basketball
Meditate
Women need to know that not all guys are going to hurt them the way that the guy did before they started dating me. I know guys I wouldn't go out with.
Garry Shandling
Me
Hurt
Women
Before
Way
Out
Guy
Guys
Dating
Know
Go
Did
Going
Them
Started
Need
I've never had anyone put on a puppet show to convince me of anything. And I've done a lot of stuff. I don't know that I would put the puppets on when I was pitching a show. This was the head of the studio putting a puppet show on. And I'll tell you, he wasn't bad.
Garry Shandling
Me
You
Tell
Bad
Puppet
Puppet Show
Would
Puppets
Never
Had
He
Studio
Put
Head
Putting
Stuff
Know
Lot
Done
Pitching
Anyone
Anything
Convince
Show
I keep my scrapbooks in the car. When I come to a stoplight, I start looking through my past. Sometimes I wish the red lights were longer.
Garry Shandling
Sometimes
Car
Wish
Looking
Past
Through
Red
Longer
Lights
Come
Were
Keep
Start
Nobody can write better jokes putting me down than me.
Garry Shandling
Me
Jokes
Better
Down
Write
Putting
Nobody
Than
I don't know how to ground myself without the other actor present.
Garry Shandling
Myself
Other
Know
Without
How
Ground
Actor
Present
I don't know why men are so fascinated with television and I think it has something to do with - if I may judge from my own father, who used to sit and stare at the TV while my mother was speaking to him - I think that's a man's way of tuning out.
Garry Shandling
Man
Judge
Mother
Father
Men
Sit
Own
Think
Way
Television
Out
TV
Something
My Own
Know
Him
May
Tuning
While
Used
Speaking
Who
Fascinated
Stare
Why
The only way I would go back to hosting would be if it were something entirely new. It would prevent me from wanting to host a standard-fare kind of talk show.
Garry Shandling
Me
Back
Way
Kind
Would
Would-Be
Entirely
Something
Only
Prevent
Host
Hosting
New
Talk
Talk Show
Go
Were
Wanting
Show
Which is, I'm an optimist that two people can be together to work out their conflicts. And that commitment, I think, might be what love is, because they both grow from their relationship.
Garry Shandling
Work
Love
Relationship
Together
Commitment
Love Is
People
Think
Out
Both
Dating
Because
Optimist
Conflicts
Which
Might
Work Out
Grow
Two
Two People
I may discuss love, and I don't mind if two men fall in love, fine. Two women, fine. But I flinch when I think of two Jewish women getting together and having a child because the idea of having two Jewish mothers makes my head explode. I have one; I couldn't handle two.
Garry Shandling
Love
Together
Women
Mind
Men
Fall
Think
Fine
Having
Head
Idea
Because
Makes
Mothers
Discuss
Handle
Child
Getting
May
Explode
Two
Jewish
Dogs are not people. Be leery of any woman who refers to her dogs as her 'kids,' because you'll only end up paying for their schooling.
Garry Shandling
You
Woman
People
Kids
Only
Schooling
Because
Dogs
End
Up
Any
Paying
Who
Her
I watch the news, which is its own reality show. I love 'Curb Your Enthusiasm.' I love it because it's funny and because I realize that I'm happier than Larry David.
Garry Shandling
Love
Funny
News
Reality
Enthusiasm
Own
David
Because
Curb
Than
Happier
Which
Reality Show
Realize
Your
Show
Larry
Watch
That's what we were exploring on 'Larry Sanders' - the human qualities that have brought us to where we are now in the world: the addiction to needing more and wanting more and talking more. We were examining the labels put on success - is it successful to be on TV every day, to be famous, to have a paycheck?
Garry Shandling
Success
Day
Every Day
World
Every
Addiction
TV
Brought
Examining
More
Put
Qualities
Talking
Were
Labels
Human
Famous
Where
Wanting
Us
Successful
Exploring
Paycheck
Human Qualities
Now
Larry
Needing
Humor is a wonderful way to deal with our suffering because if we can laugh at our troubles, we can feel better. Thich Nhat Hanh is a special man who has helped millions with their suffering with incredible technique. But he doesn't know real suffering, because he has not dated as much as I have.
Garry Shandling
Man
Suffering
Wonderful
Better
Humor
Incredible
Our
Way
Laugh
Dated
Troubles
He
Feel
Know
Because
Deal
Real
Wonderful Way
Much
Special
Who
Helped
Technique
Millions
No more Garry Shandling quotes
Haven't find the right quote? Try quotes from authors related to Garry Shandling.
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
Milton Berle
Mitch Hedberg